Coping with change

By Caro Handley

Every change, big or small, has some impact. Arm yourself with this eight-point guide

No matter how safe, secure, predictable and stable your life is, you will still have to cope with change at points along the way. Change is a normal and essential part of life, yet, ironically, when we’re in the middle of it, it feels anything but normal.

Changes can be enormous – a marriage, new home, baby, new job, divorce, bereavement. Everyone knows that these levels of change can be very stressful and difficult to cope with. But small changes can have a big impact too, though they are often underestimated. Things like a new routine in your day, losing or gaining weight, cutting your hair short, changing a room around, not seeing a familiar face any more, can affect you for some time.

It doesn’t make any difference whether you’ve chosen the change or not, it will still have an impact on you. Imagine deciding on something as small as sleeping without a pillow. At first it would feel odd, you wouldn’t be able to get to sleep, you’d wake up in the night with a sense of loss, and wonder whether you’d ever get used to it. It might be a couple of months before sleeping without a pillow felt normal to you. And that’s the real point: change can’t be rushed. It’s about the transition from one set of circumstances to another, and that takes time.

Diana Mallaney (not verified) replied 6 days 16 hours ago

Having recently moved back to a flat I had previously lived in, has left me feeling anxious. I was living in a house I loved, but family circumstances dictated that I sell it. Also in a fairly new relationship, which has added to the feeling of stress. Reading Caro Handleys 8 point plan about coping with change has given me confort when I read it. When I feel stressed it helps calm me, and reminds me that what I am experiencing is perfectly normal in the face of change. The change will eventually feel normal and I will regain my peace of mind.

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