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Hi, my name is Jo and I’m a size 18. Apparently saying it out loud (or in print) is the first step to solving a problem. Except I don’t think I have a problem. In fact I’m almost completely happy with the way I am. But it’s that almost that concerns me. I’m not talking about a self-image issue, but more of a logistical nuisance brought on by my size – the frustration of clothes shopping.
About a month ago I set out to buy an outfit for a friend’s wedding. I wanted nothing too particular, just something flattering, and feminine that I would want to wear again. First I went to John Lewis and found not one item in my size that didn’t look like a tent. At Selfridges it was the same story that continued through the many landmarks that validate a shopping experience in London (Marks & Spencer, Next, Dickens and Jones and River Island). No luck in any of them.
After three days of breathing in, squeezing in, shedding tears and uttering colourful language, I finally found something suitable. I came away from the sorry experience with a very expensive top from Ghost, a pair of trousers from Rogers and Rogers, an ‘outsize’ high street store, and a hang-up about future clothes shopping.
The traumatic process set me thinking. If that experience can upset someone as happy with herself as I am, how does it affect people who are far less content with their bodies? We hear daily how the health and self-esteem of children and adults are ground down by media images of ‘slim, beautiful people’ but I believe personal experience can do far more damage.
Think back to being a teenager again. You’re already self-conscious, not as slim/beautiful/wealthy as your friends, and all you want to do is be like them. One weekend everyone is invited to a party, and you decide to buy a new outfit that will dazzle them all. You set out with a smile on your face, and then you can’t find anything that fits. You end up with the usual ‘fat girls’ clothes’ – an absolutely heartbreaking feeling. Or perhaps you don’t have to imagine this scenario at all. Maybe this is how you feel every time you go shopping.
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