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Diary of a dieter - week 9
Ow! I really hurt myself as I leaned over to grab some chicken breasts at the supermarket. But I quickly forgot the pain when I realised it was caused by my hip bones pressing up against the freezer. Theyve been in hiding for a while, but as the pounds continue to drop off, theyve made a welcome return.
Its moments like these that make me realise just how much weight I put on over the last few years. Because you see your body every day, you dont notice the pounds creeping on, until one day, you have a moment of truth in front of the mirror, and see the blanket of fat youve been growing for the last few years.
The re-emergence of my hip bones has really boosted my confidence just in time for my karaoke leaving party at work. I felt great in my slim-fitting trousers and danced for most of the night. While I was taking a breather, an ex-boss of mine arrived and came over for a chat. After talking for about 10 minutes, she said she was genuinely blown away by how different I looked. She said shed been trying to work out what was different about me because I looked so healthy. I guess you feel and look better when youre not carrying around excess baggage.
I have to say, the compliments kept rolling in all night and I revelled in the attention, feeling on top of the world. I had a fantastic evening and it was the first night in a long time that I genuinely enjoyed myself. Ive always had a laugh, but its only now, looking back at how I used to feel in social situations, that I realise how my confidence had taken a massive dent.
There were warning signs that my self-esteem was hurtling towards the floor, but I think I just brushed them off. I dismissed moments of unhappiness like breaking a zip as I tried to squeeze into a pair of trousers in a shop; the shocking photos taken on an Italian holiday; wanting to run and hide when I saw my ex-boyfriend with his new, slim girlfriend and put them in an imaginary box at the back of my mind.
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