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Dr Pam's love clinic - Dr. Pam Spurr

Each week, award-winning radio presenter, agony aunt, sex and relationship advisor, and life coach Dr Pam Spurr will be advising iVillagers on real-life love and sex issues. Check back every week to read her latest words of wisdom

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Recent blog posts

Apr 16

He can't always stay hard or climax

Man looking upset
Question: Dear Dr. Pam, I started seeing this guy a few weeks back, we met online so we got to know each other quite well before things got physical. I really like him and we have a great connection. I don’t think sex is the be-all and end-all of a relationship and I think I’m fairly...
No comments
Apr 09

He doesn't want a relationship

Question: Dear Dr. Pam, I have entered into a relationship with a guy who, after two months, told me he did not want a relationship with anyone ‘cause he wanted to move back home to pursue a life’s dream. I thought I could handle this... He has not planned moving back for six months. He...
No comments
Apr 03

He's turned into a lazy lover

Couple in bed back to back
Dear Dr. Pam, My husband has become a very lazy Lover. We've been together six years and have a two-year-old child. In the beginning we had loads of long sex sessions. He really knew how to satisfy me. Recently though sex is over and done with super quick. I know he works hard (and I work too...
No comments
Mar 26

I'm falling for my friend’s dad

Woman and man at a bar
Dear Dr. Pam, You'll probably never have had this question before. Put simply I fancy my best friend's father. I'm 28 and he's 56. I've got to know him over the last year since she and I started sharing a flat. We've been best friends since uni and have always shared flats...
No comments
Mar 19

How can I see if my 'drunken snog' is really interested?

Couple kissing in the back of a taxi
Dear Dr. Pam, I’m 27 and single. There is a guy who I sometimes see when I go out with my friends as he’s a friend of theirs, we get along well and we’ve kissed on a couple of occasions and are always flirty. The problem is, I only ever see him when we’re both out drinking...
1 comment
Mar 12

He's started talking about lesbians and threesomes

Two woman about to kiss
Dear Dr. Pam, You might think I'm paranoid getting in touch with this but I've never been one to experience insecurity and jealousy. My fiancé visited an art fair recently. He came back with a painting of two women entwined in bed together, it's really quite erotic. When I asked him...
No comments
Mar 05

I don't want my sexuality to be a juicy topic of conversation

Women gossiping on the tube
Dear Dr. Pam, I’m 28-years-old and, as far as anybody is concerned, I’m straight. I’ve only ever had boyfriends… until now. A couple of months back I met a woman and I was almost immediately attracted to her, we got along really well. I knew she was gay and I was curious....
No comments
Feb 26

I can hear everything when they have sex

Couple in bed
Dear Dr. Pam, I have a sex problem… but it’s not my sex life I have a problem with; It’s my housemate’s. I share a house with three girls and one of them, I'll call Rachel, and I share the top floor of the house. Our bedrooms are next to each other and when her...
No comments
Feb 19

After a one night stand he slunk away

Do not disturb
Dear Dr. Pam, I feel so embarrassed. I went to a conference in another city to represent the company I work for and ended up drinking too much. There was a free bar the whole evening and after a long day at the conference I took full advantage. There’s this man I've always fancied at...
No comments
Feb 12

How can I tame my bikini line?

Pink disposable razor - close-up
Question: Hi Dr Pam, I’m 28 and consider myself to be an attractive young woman. But I have one problem that stops me from being confident when undressing or in a bikini. I have quite a bit of hair around my bikini line. Whatever I try my bikini line comes out in a rash. I have tried all...
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