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Face the 'Factor
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I have finally allowed myself to watch The X Factor. I am, I believe, the only human being in the UK that has never watched it. I know what's going on at every stage, of course; because I am old I read newspapers - actual real newspapers, the kind that get ink on your hands.
I've read about the power ballads (that Aerosmith slow song from the Liv Tyler film about outer space is always belted-out at least once a series); the dresses (Dannii gets it right and Cheryl always gets it wrong, apparently) - they both look pretty hot to me and I would gladly partake in a body swap with either of them. I'm waffling now...
I'll tell you what's always put me off watching. It's the ritual humiliation of vulnerable kids at the audition stages. I watch through my fingers until, in the end, I switch channels.
So, this week I popped along to the premiere of Due Date and it seemed everywhere I turned there was a former X Factor contestant desperately utilising the final moments of their fifteen minutes.
I was chatting to Lloyd Daniels, cute blonde lad, he came 5th last year, remember? (He is one of the few X Factor contestants that I recognise - due to the fact that he is Welsh. Welsh people always seek out other Welsh people, it's a strange form of herding, I've never got to the bottom of why this is the case, but it's what we all do.)
Anyway, he was telling me all about his new album. It wasn't until I asked him about his record label that I realised his X Factor bubble had well and truly burst. He's signed to an independent label, which means that, despite his ridiculous good looks; his lovely voice; the exposure he's had from singing live in front of you lot week after week, none of the top record companies are interested in signing him. This, I'm sure, was not what he envisaged when he had Cheryl Cole as a mentor and the Simon Cowell machine in his corner.
It's true that the older I get, the easier it is for me to be cynical but, still, I can't help feeling sorry for these naive contestants who are thrown onto a fame train only to be booted off, discarded and left by the wayside. For every Leona Lewis there are tons of ex-contestants that lived 'the dream' for a few short weeks, only to have it snatched away from them because they couldn't manage the key change in a Whitney Houston ballad.
That said, I do think Simon Cowell is a genius. He is a member of the rich, super-elite, lucky-little-tinkers club yet he has an eye for what the man on the street (i.e you and me) want to watch and listen to. That's a gift. It would just be fairer if we could all get honest. This is variety TV at its very best. This is GOOD TELLY and its ultimate aim is to entertain us, not to find a pop star. It would just be nice if someone told the contestants that. They've been spun a heartbreaking yarn. Not and fair, IMHO.
RANT OVER!
Where was I? Ah, Robert (or Rob as I like to call him, now that we've chatted for seven minutes over a glass of champagne) Downey Jnr. has been in and out of London for a while, filming Sherlock Holmes 2 under the direction of Guy Ritchie. (Btw girls, Guy was quite grumpy on the night. Surprised?) The pair get on famously though and their mutual love was evident when Rob greeted Guy with a man snog.
It was at that moment that I fell a little bit in love with Mr Downey Jr...
He's a breath of fresh air. He's had his well-documented meltdown and he's come out at the other side: warm, friendly, sincere and with a phwoar factor of 11 out of 10. And, unlike some other Hollywood superstars, he looks like he's actually lived a life outside of the celebrity bubble.
The only drawback is that Rob's wife is as beautiful as he is handsome; as lovely as he is genuine; as ridiculously successful as he is famous. The much admired It couple as I live and breathe. I HATE it when that happens. Jealous!
RB xx
What's Hot
Clip On earrings!
The Mad Men influence is out in force on celeb street. Now, this may surprise you girls, BUT clip-on, 50s throwback earrings are the new hot thing. I know! This is just one pair of my current favourites at Braybrook.co.uk.
(And, plus point, when you tire of them, they'll make a nice, recyclable gift for your Gran.)
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