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The Ramsay recipe for family success
Tana Ramsay, wife of chef Gordon and mum to their four kids, talks about work, her marriage and guilt
Photo: Deidre Rooney
What is the most important thing to teach children?
Tana Ramsay: Independence. I was a Montessori teacher before I had children and it made me realise that children are more capable than we think. Montessori is an education system that teaches children practically, by performing tasks and through sight and touch, rather than being dictated to.
It showed me that children get so excited and proud of their achievements, such as tying a shoelace or doing up a button. When they get this bit of confidence they thrive.
I teach my kids (Megan, nine, twins Jack and Holly, eight, and Matilda, six) that helping can be fun. We have more time to do things together if they put away their toys or hang up their coats.
What makes your relationship with Gordon work so well?
Tana Ramsay: I am so lucky to have been a full-time mum while the kids were small. I got them into a good routine so Gordon and I had quality time when he got home from work.
He was setting up his first restaurant and we were able to talk about the strains. We'd think: 'Yes it is stressful but we have four kids upstairs, aren't we lucky?'.
Is it hard with the hours Gordon works?
Tana Ramsay: So many people ask me that but I think he's not in the army fighting abroad. He's home every night and we speak on the phone. Our weekends are precious and we try not to work then, so it's not a big deal if Monday to Friday are long days.
Do you enjoy being back at work?
Tana Ramsay: I went back to work three years ago to write my first cookery book and I'm just finishing my third now. It's non-stop so we have to be organised. I have rotas all over the house with who has what kitbag, and who needs to take what to school.
What has been the toughest time as a parent?
Tana Ramsay: When the twins were born prematurely. I felt guilty in case overdoing it and not putting my feet up (as Megan was only 15 months old) had caused them to come early.
When I saw these tiny helpless babies in their incubators, I felt so much determination to breastfeed and build them up. It was hard as they were so tiny, but by six months they were chubby babies and that eased the guilt.
Do you agree with Gordon on discipline?
Tana Ramsay: We came from very different backgrounds. Gordon's parents had a very volatile relationship and money was always tight. I had the exact opposite but that's been beneficial as when one of us might spoil, the other one always keeps us on track.
We're very together on discipline. The secret is to show a united front but listen to each other and discuss things.
I think it's important for the children to see that. We don't do everything perfectly but we're learning all the time. We're a close, tight unit and nothing can touch that.
Reproduced from Your Family magazine.
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