3 ways to feed your lover

Shape

No prizes for guessing which one. Begin with a salad of vine-ripened tomatoes that you slice thinly downwards, not across their middles, to produce a heart.

Interlace with slices of fresh Mozzarella you have turned into hearts by cutting a V-wedge almost halfway down through the ball. Sprinkle with torn basil leaves and good olive oil.

Follow with several small hamburger patties shaped into a heart, grilled or fried, surrounded by heart-shaped fried potatoes. For these, cut another V wedge along the side of a large par-boiled and cooled peeled potato you cooked earlier, sliced thickly into hearts.

While you eat the starter, let them gently fry in a slick of oil with a knob of butter till gold on both sides. Serve with a heart-shaped dollop of ketchup.

With strawberries available year round, pick four or five each then puree 250g more with the juice of a lemon and sugar to taste. Spread a slick across a plate, stud with the remaining strawberries sliced into three and blob whipped cream in the centre in as much of a heart shape as you can contrive.

The aphrodisiac route

This is a tried-and-tested one. No one really knows if it works, but it’s certainly worth a try. Oysters are said to have magical powers, but be sure they are squeaky fresh. The same, apparently, goes for tuna steaks, and snails.

Truffles shaved over poached eggs can work wonders, and anything chocolate for pudding. Finish with a strong cup of coffee. Caffeine is an aphrodisiac. More important, it will keep him awake.

You might be forgiven for thinking the aphrodisiac effect relates strongly to the cost of the ingredient.

But since the psychological reaction to food is mostly to do with its sensuous smell and look, a much cheaper bowl of pasta in a wonderful sauce that you can spoon into your beloved’s mouth could be far more effective.

Precede it with a trout mousse he can lick off your finger and follow with a bowl of chilled grapes (seedless – you don’t want him spitting at you) that you languidly peel as you feed them to him.

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