Fortysomething - Jacqui Leigh

Fortysomething

From men to mid life crises, from Botox to Brazilians, from infertility to infidelity, every week Jacqui Leigh gives her personal take on being a fortysomething woman

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May 11

It’s a Friday morning - my day off - and I’m at a well known north London shopping centre taking my dear old aunty shopping. This is a weekly ritual, though now and again I skip a week and sometimes - rarely - another family member, a cousin, steps in to do it. But I have to ask her...

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May 04

'There are websites for people like you...'

Business man - lower section - with business woman climbing on top of him

The clue should have been when Siobhan texted asking where I got my laser hair removal done and whether it hurt. I texted her back with the answers, a bit surprised since she’s never been especially bothered about hairiness. Not that she’s a yeti - far from it - just that she’s...

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Apr 20

Relationships make you fat... and spotty

Woman with heart print paper bag over head

Yesterday I woke up and inspected my face in the mirror as I do most mornings. As you get older, more and more things happen to your face so you need to be vigilant – it’s only so long before you need to pick up that phone and book your face lift. Yesterday morning was different however...

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Apr 05

Anal sex? No is the bottom line!

After weeks of putting it off I finally cave in to my anxiety. Much as there are certain parts of my body I would rather not discuss, let alone have poked - thanks to my cyberchondria, otherwise known as looking up my symptoms on the internet and deciding I’m going to die - I decide to bite...

5 comments

Mar 22

Do same-sex couples make better parents?

Two women holding each other and a little girl

It’s nearly 9pm and Mo is still singing in the bath and not nearly in bed. Her bedtime routine is becoming more and more drawn out and demanding, her towel must be warmed on the radiator and passed to her the moment she gets out, her hot water bottle filled and ready, and her bottle of water...

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Mar 16

Why don't dating websites reveal penis size?

A friend tells me about this woman we both know, Deirdre, who split up with her serial cheater of a husband after twenty years and is now seeing a barrister she met on a dating website. Deirdre, once a tired, careworn and anxious looking fortysomething, now looks fabulous and is busy stopping...

4 comments

Mar 07

Halfway to ninety and all the better for it!

I’m a work of art. No really I am! There’s a photo of me right now at The Hayward Gallery in London called A Girl I Fancied But Never Told. You can go and see it if you feel like forking out a tenner. I can hear you all rushing to get your Oyster card now. If you do go and are able...

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Feb 22

Who remembers carbs?

When I was small, about two, we went on a family holiday to Italy. My dad always reminds me how, sitting on his lap at dinner in the hotel, I would happily stuff my little face with a man sized portion of spaghetti night after night. As a child, whenever there was a family celebration we went to...

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Feb 16

No time for illness, pass me the drugs!

I’m at work in front of my computer working on a spreadsheet, but every time my brain grabs hold of an idea it seems to float away until finally I’m just staring at the screen in a stupor. Weird, this doesn’t usually happen until till mid afternoon when I force down a not-...

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Feb 09

I don't do parties!

The first and last time Dan and I went to a party together it was his debut as my boyfriend and he spent most of the evening trapped in a corner being pawed by a group of my drunken raptors female friends. As the months have passed we’ve managed to blot out that memory and I have stopped...

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