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When your man's got the blues
continued from page 1
Different symptoms
Men and women share many of the symptoms of depression, such as anxiety, overeating, insomnia, lack of concentration and loss of pleasure in the good things of life. Whilst women will commonly react by being sad and tearful, your man will be less likely to have these low-energy symptoms. He's been brought up to counter problems with action and he may respond with more energetic emotions, such as frustration, irritation and anger. He may lash out - verbally or physically. He may get ill - depressed men are particularly vulnerable to heart attacks. He may turn to drink or drugs or overwork in a desperate attempt to 'sort' his feelings. He may totally retreat and become suicidal.
Only when he's feeling truly overwhelmed will he retreat and become helpless - and then he'll do it big time, compulsively watching television, surfing the internet or just refusing to interact with you.
Different coping mechanisms
People with depression are often reluctant to admit they have a problem, either because they see mental illness as something to be ashamed of or because they do not recognise it as a condition that needs professional help.
Women are generally better at coping with depression than men and can talk through their concerns with friends or family without being seen as weak. But men often feel uncomfortable articulating their problems.
Your man will typically find it difficult to admit to depression. He may shrug off questions about feeling down. He may internalise his feelings, perhaps even completely cut off from you and from other people so that no one realises how bad he feels. All this may well make him feel better in the short term. But long term, of course, these strategies will not cure the real issues - physical or emotional - so he ends up feeling just as depressed or even worse.
Treatment options
People with depression often resist treatment initially, claiming they are just feeling under the weather or having a bad time at work.
Different symptoms
Men and women share many of the symptoms of depression, such as anxiety, overeating, insomnia, lack of concentration and loss of pleasure in the good things of life. Whilst women will commonly react by being sad and tearful, your man will be less likely to have these low-energy symptoms. He's been brought up to counter problems with action and he may respond with more energetic emotions, such as frustration, irritation and anger. He may lash out - verbally or physically. He may get ill - depressed men are particularly vulnerable to heart attacks. He may turn to drink or drugs or overwork in a desperate attempt to 'sort' his feelings. He may totally retreat and become suicidal.
Only when he's feeling truly overwhelmed will he retreat and become helpless - and then he'll do it big time, compulsively watching television, surfing the internet or just refusing to interact with you.
Different coping mechanisms
People with depression are often reluctant to admit they have a problem, either because they see mental illness as something to be ashamed of or because they do not recognise it as a condition that needs professional help.
Women are generally better at coping with depression than men and can talk through their concerns with friends or family without being seen as weak. But men often feel uncomfortable articulating their problems.
Your man will typically find it difficult to admit to depression. He may shrug off questions about feeling down. He may internalise his feelings, perhaps even completely cut off from you and from other people so that no one realises how bad he feels. All this may well make him feel better in the short term. But long term, of course, these strategies will not cure the real issues - physical or emotional - so he ends up feeling just as depressed or even worse.
Treatment options
People with depression often resist treatment initially, claiming they are just feeling under the weather or having a bad time at work.
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