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Fighting teen depression

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My mum could see that I wasn't right, so she forced me to tell her what was wrong. It was so hard to tell her, but I'm so glad now that I did. I showed her my arms, which were a complete mess by then. She was so upset by it, so were the rest of my family, and I felt so guilty for upsetting and worrying them, but I was so relieved that I'd let it off my chest.

She sent me to the doctors, who then referred me to a psychiatrist as an emergency case. He told me I had a quite severe case of clinical depression and that I'd had it since a very early age. It wasn't triggered by anything at all. I was put on antidepressants and sleeping tablets, and given scar treatment for my arms.

Light at the end of the tunnel

The fact that I knew I wasn't on my own anymore helped me start my recovery, and then the antidepressants kicked in. I saw the psychiatrist for about six months and, in that time, I reduced the amount of times I was harming myself and I started to take control. I forced myself not to self-harm again, and I made myself think positively, as it was the only way to beat my depression. I got so much better, I stopped seeing my psychiatrist. I did really well in my GCSE exams, which gave me a real sense of achievement. I started to enjoy life, to do what other teenagers did - I went out with my friends, got a new boyfriend and felt much more outgoing and confident.

It's been about a year now since I was diagnosed with depression and I have completely recovered. I still have the scars on my arms from then to remind me, but I'm not ashamed of them anymore. It feels like I've started afresh and I don't have to struggle through life anymore. I still have my 'off days' and the occasional spell of low self-esteem, and but I don't actually get depressed anymore. I know it could come back at any time, but now that I know how to deal with it, I don't think it would affect me as much. I think having had depression and beating it has made me a stronger person.


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