How to spot a love cheat: the tell-tale signs

What with the never-ending list of alleged cheating, sex-texting men in the press recently - Ashley Cole, John Terry, Vernon Kay and Tiger Woods - it makes you wonder: didn't their wives and girlfriends have a clue about what they were up to? How could all of them have been so blind to their partners' bad behaviour? iVillage.co.uk love and sex expert Dr Pam Spurr tells you how to spot a love cheat

Why it's hard to catch a cheat

The big problem about catching out a love cheat is that sometimes all you have is your intuition. You might be suspicious, but you can't put your finger on exactly why you feel that way.

You don't have actual 'proof' like suggestive text messages, mysterious phone calls, or lipstick on his collar. Also, the likes of Tiger, John, and Ashley are on the road a great deal of the time. When these sportsmen are away it's almost impossible to know what they're doing in their free time.

You can hardly ask their coaches or managers to keep tabs for you!

So what kind of signs and signals can you look for?

There are lots of signs and signals a love cheat gives off, if you know what to look for. And these come in three crucial categories. But a word of caution first: if the man or woman in your life shows one or two of these signals they may simply be feeling under pressure from your questioning rather than outright lying about something.

First let's take a look at a person's vocal tone:

Love cheats will do the following:

They'll try and keep their voice completely steady. This is unnatural to the way we normally speak - as our voice naturally goes up and down, slows and speeds up. But a cheat's trying so hard not to sound nervous that they do this. Listen to see if their voice starts rising over time. As someone gets nervous - when they're telling a lie - their vocal chords start constricting which slightly raises the pitch of their voice. Beware if they make a tell-tale 'catching' noise as they answer a question. This is where their voice catches in their throats as if they're literally choking on their lying words.