The £100 Christmas

Make this Christmas the one you've always wanted. The first step will involve explaining to others what you want to do. Tell your family that you're not criticising past celebrations, rejecting childhood memories or giving up traditions. Tell them instead that Christmas means so much to you that you want to make it as happy and festive as possible.

If people worry about a transformed Christmas, it's often because they don't know what to expect. So when you talk with relatives, make sure you offer suggestions about new kinds of gifts - everyone wants to give something. Tell grandparents that you'll record them reading a story so your child will be able to hear them read it over and over; urge uncles and aunts to give a trip to the museum instead of a robotic dinosaur.

Don't be surprised if it takes a few years to readjust. Many families begin by drawing names each Christmas so that everyone has only one present to buy for the next year. In most of the families I've talked with, though, people have come to love making some of their presents. No one expects you to build a gorgeous bookshelf or knit an evening dress. My mother makes calendars for the family, featuring a photo she's taken each month. And then there's my favourite present that my wife always gives me. She draws a picture on a circle of white paper and has it turned into a plastic plate. All year I look forward to it, wondering which small event of our lives will 'make the plate'.

Our daughter's godmother and her daughters made an alphabet book one year, twisting their bodies into the shape of each letter and then taking photographs. One year my mother wrote out all my grandmother's favourite recipes in a book. You can make a card game of family trivia, or pass along a piece of jewellery that has some important connection - small children will take quite seriously the idea that Granny wore this brooch at her wedding, or Granddad wore these cufflinks. Instead of buying new ornaments for the tree, you can use old toys as decorations, each one bringing back memories, or even make your own.