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Women and Violent Crime: stories from iVillagers
Those were the questions we asked iVillagers as part of a new iVillage campaign on crime and personal safety. Read on to find out what you had to say...
Kirstin's story
'This is a question close to my heart as every day my life is affected by the fear of violent crime. When I was 15 (I'm 32 now) my mum and dad's house was broken into and they were both attacked by a man with a crowbar. Both had to have stitches in their head, my mum also had to have stitches in her arm. The attacker received a life sentence and has gone on to murder someone in jail. He is now is a secure unit for the most dangerous men in the country.
'Although I was not personally hurt in the attack I did run in and see the man in our kitchen - it was 7.30 in the morning. The effect of that attack has never left me. I am terrified to stay in houses on my own (especially my mum and dad's). When I lived in shared houses, and even when I moved in with a (now ex-) boyfriend a few years ago I would become hysterical if I knew I was going to be the only one in overnight. I would shake, cry and after checking every door and window five times would literally have to go to bed. Once there I couldn't get up in the night to go to the loo.
'Luckily I have very understanding friends who often came to my rescue. I have lived alone for 18 months now and cope OK. I have a security light outside my entrance door - which is quite secluded - a burglar alarm and a great big lump of wood next to my bed in case the damn thing goes off (an even more frightening feeling as I discovered after my parents had one installed). The burglar alarm has at least taken away that terrifying feeling of opening my front door and wondering who is on the other side. Other ghosts still haunt me though.
'All that said, I have to admit that I am guilty of getting into unlicensed cabs and I often shudder and beat myself up at the thought of myself stumbling around London after one too many or falling asleep on the tube. I hate that my life is dominated by this fear. It's all very well to say violent crime is rare and, having been affected by it myself aside, I certainly wouldn't challenge a kid in the street anymore if I saw them dropping litter. I pray that I would still have the strength to step in if I saw a child being bullied (I have done this before) or an innocent person attacked although, as they say on the ads, "I don't know if I could do that".
'You really don't know what could happen these days. It makes me so sad.'
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