The unofficial Desperate Housewives guide to seduction

Are you like Lynette (Felicity Huffman)?

Her character
A former career girl, she's now a stay-at-home mom with four kids under the age of six. With a wimpy husband who doesn't seem to help out much, she's (not surprisingly) the scruffy one who has neither the time nor the inclination to put on makeup.

Her seduction style
Lynette has a determined stride instead of a wiggle, and point-blank refuses to join the rest of Wisteria Lane in their look-at-me fashions. In the traditional sense, her character is undisputedly the least sexy of all five women. But ironically, this form of 'anti-flirting' has its own allure. Her unflinching eye contact makes her appear challenging. The way she tosses her head suggests pride and spirit. And her world-weary observations might be cynical, but they're certainly funny. She'd appeal to a man who wants to tussle intellectually (as well as under the covers).

Get his attention, Lynette style
Dress in a slithery, slinky, cling-to-every-curve number, and any flirtatious gesture is magnified. But the joy of dressing down which is Lynette's trademark is that you can get away with murder when it comes to flirting. Casual clothes dilute the probability that you're seen as slutty. So go for it! Stand close and do a 'Di.' Princess Diana's trademark was to tip her chin down and look up through lowered lashes. It not only makes your eyes look enormous - a universally attractive characteristic - it makes you seem slightly adoring, perhaps even a little shy. On less intelligent women, a 'Di' works against you (imagine the word 'bimbo' appearing in a bubble above your head). Done by someone who's clearly intelligent, however, it can make you appear more approachable.

Make the first move
Lynette might appear conservative, but she's a definite risk taker (she's a corporate girl, remember?). If you're like her, you suit a direct approach. When you feel his hands start to snake their way upward, take charge (and take his breath away) by lifting his hands and putting them directly on your breasts. If you're feeling really brave, you'll stop kissing, fix him with a wickedly lusty look, then remove your top to reveal the world's sexiest bra.

Keep him panting
They might be the apple of your eye, but children are also remarkably effective sex saboteurs. You and your man are lovers as well as parents, so do whatever it takes to stay sexually connected. Ideally, you'd have one dirty weekend away every three months. If you can't manage it, make a deal with friends who also have kids. Every weekend, someone sits all the little darlings, while the other couples get a few hours to enjoy each other.

Possible pitfalls of being a Lynette
Quite apart from salvaging a sex life from under a pile of nappies, a supersharp mind can frighten lesser mortals. Happily, most Lynettes would rather die alone and be eaten by wolves than date someone who isn't up to the intellectual challenge. Just be aware that an attitude like that can sometimes be seen as insensitive.