Parenting 

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Take ten women

continued from page 4
The working mum


Jennifer Beal, 30, works four days a week as an occupational therapist in a secure unit for mentally disturbed inpatients. She lives in South Woodford, London, with her partner Terril and their two daughters Sophie, 4, and Alice, 2

"With both of my children, I worked right up until the end of my pregnancy and then went back when they were six months old. Both times it's felt very difficult to go back, but for different reasons.

I was still breastfeeding Sophie when I returned to work and I found it impossible to get her to take milk, either expressed or formula from a bottle. She was due to start nursery near where we live, and I was tearing my hair out with worry about how she'd take a drink while I was at work. For the first two months after I returned, I'd jump in the car during my lunch break, drive from Hackney, where I work, to nursery, quickly breastfeed her and then whizz back to work again. It was a nightmare, but by eight months she finally started taking juice from a bottle.

Alice, on the other hand, just didn't settle at nursery and would scream the place down when either Terril or I tried to leave her there. I used to dread the mornings I'd drop her off, because it goes against every motherly instinct to walk away when your child is crying. But I had to. She developed one cold after another at nursery and always seemed to be ill. This meant I was constantly taking time off work to take her to the doctor. Eventually we realised we couldn't go on this way, so we hired a childminder to come into our home and care for the girls.

It couldn't have worked out better. Nikki used to work at the nursery and then had a baby of her own so she comes to our house with her daughter and looks after them altogether. It's such a relief. I know the girls are with someone I can trust and they're really happy in their own environment.

Anyone who works and has children knows it's a juggling act, but I like my job and never wanted to give up. I think you get used to having your own income, and I also like the fact that I have another aspect to my life that challenges me in a different way from the way that being a mum does.

Work is very understanding of the fact that I have children and it's not usually a problem to take time off, if I have to do something with the girls. I'm not saying that it's not stressful or tiring trying to do everything properly, because at times it can be - but I don't work on Fridays or the weekend and that time is all about the girls. On Fridays we go swimming and to mum-and-toddler playgroup, and on the weekend we do stuff as a family or visit other friends in the area with children. Things like ironing or dusting are way down on the list because it's about prioritising what's more important - drawing with the girls or cleaning the loo? Terril and I make an effort to go out together occasionally, too, because when you're trying to hold together lots of different threads, sometimes, it's easiest to neglect your partner."

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