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10 ways to help your child manage stress

Children feel just as overloaded with responsibilities - and therefore stress - as adults do. Teach them how to handle the tough times with these practical techniques.

To learn to deal with stress, a child needs to develop an inner watchdog that can recognise when emotions, duties and responsibilities could or are beginning to feel overwhelming. These ten techniques will help them know when they are stressed and what attitudes, behaviours and insights are good coping strategies:

1. Identify symptoms of anxiety Take inventory of your inner voice when it repeatedly announces, 'I'm worried about?'. Whether it's that imminent maths test, party or football game, make a note of the silent alarm bell in your head. Catch yourself, and pay attention to nervous habits like hair twirling, nail biting, eye twitching and foot tapping.

2. Ask for help You don't have to handle everything on your own. Look for a helping hand. Or you can delegate a portion of a task that is overwhelming. Even the act of venting to someone about all the stress you feel will help you find emotional support and nurturing.

3. Create an action plan to handle a forthcoming worrying challenge Divide the task up into parts you can manage. A one-step-at-a-time approach divides and conquers anxiety.

4. Identify activities that relax you Listening to music, going for a walk, calling a friend - those are healthy diversion techniques. Take note of the things that bring you pleasure and exercise them when you need a lift or distraction.

5. Analyse how you explain failure Do you blame yourself? Laying blame and taking responsibility are two different things. Pessimists blame themselves; optimists don't. Don't say, 'I failed the test because I am stupid or incompetent.' Do say, 'I failed because the test covered material I didn't focus on when studying.' In the latter situation, you are in control of changing the situation for the better. Realise that you can plan more effectively for similar challenges in the future. Beating yourself up is self-defeating; it leaves you feeling powerless when, in fact, you are not.
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