During the teenage years your child may become blinkered in their outlook to life. This is the age when young people often give up interests, hobbies and sports that they participated in from a young age. The pull to 'do things' with their friends to the exclusion of all else can become very strong. For many teens this is a temporary phase, but it does potentially have negative consequences for their present and future well-being.

It's important to recognise that teenagers have a great need to feel part of their immediate peer group. They have a constant desire to be up on everything that's going on. This can be very frustrating to parents as they watch their once all tap-dancing, tennis-playing, and drama-clubbing child disappear. Only to be replaced by a grunting adolescent who appears to have no interests other than what their friends are doing.

Research demonstrates this strong need to be part of a cohesive peer group is found in the vast majority of teenagers. However it also shows that those with the most general confidence, and measured encouragement, are also the ones who can find balance: continuing with outside interests and academic work, and continuing to have aspirations. You can help to encourage this balance.

Research also shows that schoolwork can suffer from the many distractions that friends and socialising offer if there's no structure at home to encourage a happy medium. If they become disheartened with their schoolwork it may decline, leading to a self-fulfilling cycle where they've less interest in their future and have fewer aspirations. Then they're even less likely to participate in outside interests when the opportunity arises. Never think you can't make a difference, though.

A few general tips to prevent this potentially downward spiral include:

Encourage any talents or skills you notice in your teen. It may be completely unrelated to their earlier childhood interests but that's a positive. They may feel happier developing a completely new talent or skill than continuing with one they had as a youngster, that they now perceive as childish
When encouraging such talents or skills, casually throw into conversations about these where they might fit into a future career. For example, your child might show some artistic skills, which leads you to comment on how such skills may come in useful as a web designer
Sometimes your teen won't realise they have a particular talent or they'll feel too insecure/embarrassed to blow their own horn. Ensure you blow it for them when in private. Teens hate having attention drawn to their 'talents' when friends/relations are around
Enjoy the positive times when they're getting on with schoolwork or a hobby! Many parents ignore good behaviour or attempts at something new and only pay attention to the negative things their teens do. Make a fuss over them (in private) when they've committed to a project, shown interest in something or are just being positive about life
Remember that what you may not see as an interesting hobby for them to take up, may be something to do with their future career.

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Broadening your teen's horizons