Foster a mum-and-baby

Although both Pat and Julie are keen to emphasise the positive aspects of the fostering relationship, they admit that there can be stresses.

‘Mums don’t necessarily look after their babies the way you’d like them to – they may let them cry all night,’ says Pat. But she insists that no carer is left to make a go of it on their own.

‘There’s a support network for both the young mum and myself. Each young mum who is placed here has a social worker and I have a link worker. We have the support of the health service and health visitors and whatever support is needed we can get it.’

‘We had one blazing row once and I was going to go,’ laughs Julie. ‘But Pat came upstairs and said “I don’t want you to go” and we cried and hugged. Thank God I didn’t leave because I don’t know what I’d do without her to be honest.’

There is no time limit on the arrangement. It continues until the young mum feels she can manage on her own. At that point the foster carer often takes on the role of the girl’s outreach worker – still around to provide support and advice when and if it’s needed.

Julie and her baby stayed with Pat for two years and have kept in close contact since they moved into a place of their own.

‘Pat is like a second grandmother to my daughter,’ says Julie. ‘I’m still close to my own mum, but thank God I had that break from her. I don’t know what it would have been like bringing up baby with all that arguing going on.’

For more information on fostering young mothers, look at the National Foster Care Association website or contact them on 020 7620 6437. You can also contact your local council.