Who will care for the children?

One less than happy experience

A couple of months later we fostered Jane, a ten-year-old girl with a mental age of five - an experience that drove me to the brink. She was traumatised by abuse. The slightest fright, such as the noise of a dentist's drill, could send her into hours of screaming. I was completely out of my depth and the placement broke down after nine weeks. Thankfully, Jane is now living happily with 'project care' foster parents, who are highly experienced, better paid and specially trained.

The toddlers are coming

A brace of toddlers arrived next: a two-year-old boy with behavioural problems, and his one-year-old brother. By then Jack was two and I was six months pregnant with our third child. It was a tiring three weeks - mountains of nappies, rows of highchairs - but I look back with pleasure. They were lovely children and their tired teenage mum had a decent rest.

Entertaining angels unawares

Then something unexpected happened. Tabitha came for two weeks to give her mother - who suffers from Huntington's Chorea (an incurable genetic disease) - a break. Right from the beginning, she fitted into our family as if she was meant to be there.

Three years on, Tabitha stays with us for four nights a week. When her mother becomes unable to care for her, she'll live with us full time until she's grown up. As far as we're concerned, she's our fourth child, and we love her.

While fostering has often been wonderful, it's not always easy. Occasionally it can leave you weeping with frustration and wondering why you ever started in the first place. Nobody would do it for the money (£60 a week for a child under five, rising to about £115 for a youngster over 15, to include food, travel - and size ten trainers).

To make fostering work, you need energy and patience - and everyone in the family has to be in agreement. Your own children end up fostering too, whether they like it or not - especially if they're sharing their bedroom with the new arrival, as Amy did several times.

You have to be sure that it's right for everyone. It works for us, and for me it's the most rewarding job in the world.