Is anger a symptom of post-natal depression?

Dear Luanne,

Perhaps your anger has more to do with adjustment to motherhood than depression. You are under pressure to be eternally patient with your baby so you may have to let off steam with your husband because this is more acceptable than expressing it towards your child. It would be more likely to fall under ‘post-natal depression’ if you were directing it at your child. However, because you are not, I prefer to label it ‘post-natal adjustment syndrome’.

Your body has endured many changes, hormonally and otherwise. New motherhood means that you have less time to take care of yourself or your husband. It is natural for you to focus your energies primarily on your baby in the beginning as you get to know her and what she needs from you. As you master the complexity of this profound change in your life, you will be able to turn your energy to the marriage again.

How do you feel about your body since your daughter was born? How did the childbirth go for you? Have you recovered from the psychological and physiological impact of the previous year? It is essential to take care of yourself as a mother. Often, continued agitation with others masks an unresolved loss that has not found expression.

Once you have found some time for yourself, you may also discover that you have more patience for your husband. Consider scheduling some quality time alone together. Refocus your attention on your relationship and explore the changes that being parents has brought to you both.

Gayle Peterson is the family therapist on Parentsplace.com

Visit her website at www.askdrgayle.com