Birth story: induced labour

Within minutes Judith had him sucking on her finger, and then my breast, where he latched on like a pro. Ian and I spent a blissful hour and a half with our precious boy just gazing at this miraculous new life.

The downside of rapid delivery was that he had a bit of fluid in his lungs (it hadn't all been squeezed out on way down) and he needed a little extra oxygen until the fluid dispersed. So he went into special care, but is now absolutely fine. We've established breastfeeding and it is just so blissful tending to my little man, feeding and gazing at his perfect contented face.

Poignant start

I have had some emotional moments since he has been born. The most poignant was going into Milo's room when we first got home - it was decorated for Otto last year and we didn't want to change it. I know that if Otto had lived, Milo would not be here now, so I feel as if my two sons will always have this very special link.

The other really emotional part was Milo being in special care, because once again I was on the maternity ward without a baby, while the other mums were all bustling around their own babes. But knowing it was only temporary, I coped okay, and I never doubted for a minute that Milo would be fine.

I did have some doubts about being induced nearly two weeks early - felt like I was disturbing him before he was ready. But then I know I couldn't have coped with the stress of going full-term, having lost Otto so close to term last year. So I do think it was the right decision.

Love and healing

I can't describe how healing this has all been. Finally I'm smiling and meaning it, and I've given Milo life and can care for him, feed him, love him, hold him. I've longed for this moment.