Birth story: Born into my hands at home

At this point, I sit up on my knees, and feel my waters break (they're clear). This forces the head down even further! Gaynor asks if there's anything she can do to help, but I tell her no. I am going to have to catch this baby myself.

The next contraction seconds later pushes the baby's head through my vagina and into my waiting hands. I stroke his head and wonder if he'll cry. I tell everyone to remain calm, but that baby is on the way. My next contraction pushes his shoulders out and I guide the rest of his body onto my right-hand side pressed close against my body. WOW! I did it! I look at my watch, covered in vernix and green water: 11.27pm.

I pull him away from my chest to look at him for the first time and see the umbilical cord is around his neck twice and also around his foot, forcing me to do a juggling act to unravel him. His purplish colour disappears and he starts to cry.

11.30pm: He's OK! Still no midwives, doula or paramedic. I get some towels and wrap him up, trying to dry him off. The midwife on the phone tells us not to move or cut the cord. I hear Ben ask me if it's a girl or a boy from downstairs. 'It's a boy!' I tell him.

11.40pm: Midwife, Judith, arrives to see me still on the bathroom floor (I am scared to move in case I bleed) and helps me to my bed.

20th October
12.15am: He takes to my breast already and gently suckles, still only wrapped in a towel.