Pregnancy & Baby 

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Toddler jealous of the new baby

It sounds as if your daughter, who is still very young herself, has now realised what life with a new baby brother is really like.

• Try to find ways to show her how much you appreciate her being a ‘big girl’, how she can do things that are impossible for the baby. It’s no fun being a ‘big girl’ if people mainly expect you to be patient and put up with visitors admiring the little interloper.
• It will be hard with a new baby, but do your level best to have time just for you and your daughter – perhaps when the baby is napping. Do any activity that she enjoys and show how much you like her company and admire what she can do or her helping of you around the home.
• You cannot let her treat her brother roughly, but she will only have a limited idea of how to be gentle. 2-3 year olds do sometimes treat babies rather like an old teddy. You can say, ‘Don’t yank his arm; it will hurt him’, but look for a chance to say, ‘That’s the way, see he’s smiling at you’. Perhaps go on to recall, ‘I remember your very first smile. It made me so happy.’
• She probably plays up at feeding time because you are so absorbed with the baby. Can you organise feeding so that she can be near? If you are breastfeeding, it would be possible to sit with your daughter on a wide chair or sofa and read her a book at the same time. If you are bottle-feeding, it may be her who has to hold the book, but a close and relaxed time can be possible.

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