By learning about games, you’ll also be able to help your child find alternative games (like sports or racing games) that provide action without the blood and gore.

My (Mark) two sons, Michael (ten) and Mathew (14), are typical. Left to their own devices, they’d spend much of their day wandering from violent television shows to violent video and computer games. Their sense of reality would soon be warped. So what can you do as a parent?

First, become a knowledgeable game buyer. Read the side of the box before you buy it. You’ll probably see a small label (which most people ignore) that will warn you if there’s questionable content, like nudity, bad language or graphic violence.

Also be sure to test-drive the software before your children do. Computer software shops often offer demos of the hottest new titles or you can download a preview from the Web. Also read the game reviews in PC magazines such as PC Gamer.

You'll learn the terminology and get early warnings about games you may not find suitable. By learning about games you’ll be able to help your child find alternatives that provide action without blood and gore.

Forge a family agreement
What happens if you turn off your family PC? Your child just goes over to his friend’s house to play the games.

This is where a family agreement comes into play. Just as watching adult-rated videos at a friend’s home is against family rules, super-violent game playing is against the rules – anywhere.

Consequences for breaking the rules should be applicable, such as no computer access for a specified period of time.

After some initial grumbling, both my sons have agreed to a family pact. They seemed glad that I gave them a voice in the matter in determining what types of games are appropriate.

I also talked to two of my sons’ friends’ parents about what they allow their children to play. One of the parents didn’t even realise that one of the games contained graphic violence.

Of course, if the parent doesn’t mind that their child is blowing bodies apart or running over pedestrians in fast cars, they may want to rethink how much time their child spends in that environment.

Last, find alternative programmes. Rather than deny the child’s desire for high action, search for what we call ‘high action, low violence’ alternatives, such as sports and racing games. Examples include:

· Racing Games: Need for Speed II; Motorcross Madness; Monster Truck Madness
All offer great 3D graphics and lots of action.

· Sports: NBA Live; Hardball; Madden NFL; NHL2000 (our favourite)
All bring sports to a new level in terms of visuals and fun – and they're easy to play.

· Strategy: Age of Empires; Command and Conquer series
Avoid these if you don’t want any violence, but you’ll have to admire the detail in these games – they actually do require strategic thinking.

Guidelines will vary from family to family. In our house, we’ve banned games promoting up-close, graphic violence just for the sake of a cheap thrill. We don’t condone close-up views of bodily harm (blood, guts and dismemberment).

On the other hand, elements of violence are permitted if they're not graphic (more of the cartoon character, bop-over-the-head type).

A good example is the game Command and Conquer, in which you manoeuvre tiny soldiers, tanks, ships and planes over a vast landscape. You can shoot soldiers and blow up buildings, but this is a low-level violence in the scheme of today’s games.