Who's the daddy now?

The love lives of the rich and famous are changing - the women are in charge. Find out which of these Hollywood divas rule the roost in their relationships

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are reportedly rowing because she refuses to do anything other than her own thing. She banned him from smoking in their Paris apartment, refused to take his advice about not flying late in her pregnancy and is said to have turned down his marriage proposals on more than one occasion. Below are more A-list ladies who wear the trousers, and whose men are happy (ish) to serve them

Charlize Theron and Stuart Townsend

They met in August 2001 on the set of Trapped. Now engaged, they have worked together in Head In The Clouds, and Stuart, 33, also had a small role in her movie, Aeon Flux. Thirty-year-old Charlize, who has earned $6.4 million from advertising Dior alone, is fiercely ambitious and addicted to working, placing her among the top ten most powerful women in Hollywood.

Who's in charge?
Charlize has reportedly been using her influence to help Stuart find scripts after the shock cancellation of his ABC series Night Stalker. Townsend, a former boxer from Ireland, has had little luck attracting the kind of roles he wants - he was originally cast as Aragorn in The Lord of the Rings, but was replaced by Viggo Mortensen after four days of shooting because they realised he was too young for the role.

The imbalance in their relationship has even prompted gossip in recent months that they were on the verge of splitting. But South African Charlize, who has a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, is protective of her underexposed partner. 'I think the most important thing is not what the person's occupation is, but just the personalities. We understand each other's jobs. We're very supportive of each other and know how much our careers mean to us - so we never stand in the way of each other,' she says. Got that, Stu?

Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe

These Southern belles met at her 21st birthday party and then worked together on Cruel Intentions. They married in 1999 when she was 23 and have two children, six-year-old Ava and Deacon, two. 'When you marry young like we did, you find that you're evolving during your partnership,' says Reese, 'and your ideas and needs may be changing. You have to be responsive to that and not ignore things.'

Who's in charge?
Since winning an Oscar for Walk The Line, 30-year-old Reese has been fighting off rumours her marriage is on the rocks and that Ryan feels that he is in her shadow. Now the most highly paid woman in Hollywood, commanding $30 million per film, she remains pragmatic about the ups and downs of the industry. 'We both understand the nature of the film business and we know that there's so much chance involved - it all comes down to getting the right film and the right role,' she says.

Rumours of the couple leading separate lives have refused to disappear, but Reese does run her own production company, Type A Films, and they also have two young children. 'No couple spends 24/7 together,' says their rep. They go on weekly dates to keep their romance alive, and Reese herself insists they are just like any normal couple. However Ryan, 31, is battling to outdo his famous wife - he has four films in the pipeline, including Flags of our Fathers, directed by Clint Eastwood. Meanwhile, Reese has defended him for his lack of blockbuster appeal. 'Ryan is confident in his own abilities and doesn't equate his identity with how well his film does at the box office,' she says.

Catherine Zeta Jones and Michael Douglas

After seeing her on-screen in The Mask of Zorro, Michael engineered a meeting with Catherine. After telling her at their first meeting he wanted to father her children, he pursued her relentlessly for nine months before she finally gave in. Welsh girl Catherine has always set out to prove herself and Michael's support has encouraged her. 'I have my own money,' says Wales' richest woman, who has a fortune of $315 million. 'I am self-sufficient, which is good for a relationship. I've never had a cent from any guy, and I'm very proud of that.'

Who's in charge?
Thirty-six-year-old Catherine has become the family breadwinner after her husband agreed to take a back seat and put his career on hold. He spent three years at home raising their tots Dylan, five, and three-year-old Carys, and also says he has come to accept photographers asking him to step aside so they can snap his gorgeous wife alone. 'We're in different places in our lives career-wise,' acknowledges Catherine. 'The fact that there's a 25-year age difference is kind of fantastic. We aren't vying for the kind of attention that maybe two actors around the same age might.'

Michael hasn't shelved his career entirely in favour of becoming a house-husband. He starred in The Sentinel with Eva Longoria and Kiefer Sutherland, and is building up his production portfolio. 'My wife deserves everything she gets. There is no jealousy,' says the 61-year-old. 'When your wife is younger and at the prime of her career, she should be entitled to go and do whatever she wants to do work-wise. I don't compete with her.'

Julia Roberts and Danny Moder

Superstar Julia, 38, is happily married to cameraman Danny Moder, who she met whilst making The Mexican. She is also mum to 18-month-old twins Phinnaeus and Hazel. She earned $25 million for her last film, Mona Lisa Smile, and is still the most powerful woman in Tinseltown.

Who's in charge?
After becoming a mum, Julia has led a more low-profile life at her New Mexico ranch. She plays down her success and is not trying to outshine her shy hubby. 'I have a very blessed life. I have been able to have a lot of great career opportunities and been able to build on them over a long time, so the focus on my career can be very sporadic and of my choosing,' she says modestly. Her Broadway debut in the play Three Days of Rain made national news, proving that despite mixed reviews, the pretty woman still has a place in America's heart.

In the past, Julia has dated many famous leading men including Liam Neeson, Daniel Day-Lewis and Matthew Perry. Since she wed Danny in July 2002, Julia has often been asked if her marriage to Danny, 37, is easier because he isn't another celebrity. 'He is very warm, loving and understanding,' she gushes. 'That's what everyone needs in a partner.'

Britney Spears and Kevin Federline

Kevin was an unknown dancer who had performed with Britney's ex, Justin Timberlake, when these two fell for each other. She cancelled her tour and he left his then girlfriend, Shar Jackson, who was six months pregnant, to be with the pop princess. They married in October 2004 and baby Sean Preston was born in September 2005. Since hooking up with Kevin, 24-year-old Britney has swapped her glam sex kitten look for takeaways and cigarettes.

Who's in charge?
Now she is pregnant again, it is expected Britney will give her husband short shrift. She is still a target for the paparazzi despite not having released a single for more than a year, but is said to be working on new material due out in November, as well as releasing a remix album.

Despite appearances and rumours of arguments, 28-year-old Kevin does wax lyrical about his love for his wife. 'She's my angel, everything I've ever wanted in life, in a person, in a human being. Her soul is caring. She's just a giving person,' he says. After spending a third of her $185 million fortune in a few years, Brit reportedly gives her hubby an allowance each month - which he often blows in the first week on nights on the town. Any big items - cars, or trips that go over allowance - need to be approved by Britney herself. In a bid to get out of her shadow, K-Fed has launched a rap career - financed by his wife.

Madonna and Guy Ritchie

The couple hit it off after first being introduced by mutual friends Sting and Trudie Styler. In August 2000, their son Rocco was born, joining Madonna's daughter Lourdes by personal trainer Carlos Leon. They married at Skibo Castle in Scotland in December 2000.

Who's in charge?
Worth £227 million, Madge would be hard-pushed to find herself a man more famous than she is. To keep things sweet, she does bend to her husband's will sometimes - their Wiltshire manor house was his idea, for example. Guy, 38, doesn't seem to suffer from much of a complex where his older and more-famous wife is concerned - a documentary about the singer, I'm Going to Tell You a Secret, showed her begging him to leave the pub and come home with her, as well as looking upset when he couldn't make her show.

'He stormed out of the room when I played him some of these tracks [on her album],' she says. 'He thought it was shit. He likes songs with stories, pub music.' Since Lock, Stock... and the less well-received Snatch, Guy's career has looked to be flagging. The fact won't have been helped by 47-year-old Madonna throwing herself into work on promoting her album, Confessions on a Dancefloor. But being with Guy has softened the Material Girl. 'If you can get along with your husband and work towards loving them unconditionally,' she says, 'chances are you're going to be a lot more compassionate and a lot less judgmental towards your fellow man.'

Equally matched and loving it

Scarlett Johansson and Josh Hartnett:
These two have so much in common: both young, both great-looking, both already hugely successful. Sparks flew between them on the Bulgarian set of The Black Dahlia and they have moved into a swanky New York apartment together. A firm favourite in Hollywood, she has six films in the pipeline, while heartthrob Josh is following up his success in Lucky Number Slevin with three more movies.

Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin
The Oscar-winning actress has found an equally-matched partner in the form of the lead singer with one of the best-selling bands in the world, Coldplay. Although not from the same Hollywood circles, Chris impressed Gwynnie by using his fame for a good cause, to highlight poverty in the developing world. This relationship works because they don't have to compete for attention in the same arena.

Jennifer Connelly and Paul Bettany
These two take it in turns to accompany each other on set, according to who is working at the time, to take care of their two children. Since they married in January 2003, they have preferred to live in New York rather than Tinseltown. The Da Vinci Code has made Paul a household name across the world, but dark-haired beauty Jennifer can hold her own in the acting stakes, following up her Best Supporting Actress Oscar for A Beautiful Mind with a string of hits.

Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner
Unlike his relationship with another famous Jennifer (Lopez), Ben and Jen are much more evenly matched and her star doesn't eclipse his. Since marrying in June 2005, they have celebrated the birth of daughter Violet and are enjoying their time as first-time parents together, although both have big projects coming up.

Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake
Another pair who enjoy acclaim in different fields, Cam and Justin are both well-matched in terms of their success rating. He has made the difficult transition from singing to acting, and Cam is still very much in demand as a beautiful leading lady.