| Stories from the streets
Five young runaways - one only six when he first left home - reveal their heartbreaking stories to iVillage
Lauren's story: Lauren was only 10 years old when she faced a double whammy - not only did her parents divorce, but she learnt that her father had been physically abusing her mother for years. Her mother by this time had turned to alcohol for help and began neglecting her daughter. Lauren was left to fend for herself. 'She didn't care about me and drank all night and slept all day,' says Lauren. 'I had to look after myself.' Lauren began to spend a lot of time at her friend's house and became involved in taking drugs. The situation was only made worse by the fact that Lauren and her mother had to move home several times to avoid further violence from her father. As a result, Lauren spent several periods in foster and residential care, but often ran away to be with friends. Things didn't get any better for Lauren when, aged 14, her mother finally settled into a permanent home with a female partner. Lauren admits she resented the arrival of a new adult and left home to be with the family of a friend. However, things were far from harmonious there. She was sexually assaulted by her friend's brother and was forced to flee. Of course she had nowhere to go and ended up, alone and scared, on the streets. Lauren coped by taking drugs. Her recollection of that time and her false bravado speak volumes. She says: 'It was alright really 'cos I was just getting powdered up and just getting wrecked off my face - and would end up finding somewhere to sleep.' When Lauren was 16, she moved into a hostel for young homeless people where she currently lives. Even today, she often harms herself and feels suicidal. 'Everything repeats on me,' she confesses. 'Everything bad that can happen to a person has happened to me.'
Mark's story Mark started running away when he was just 10 years old to escape conflict at home. His parents were constantly arguing and there was also tension between Mark and his siblings. By the time he was 12, he had left home several times, often sleeping rough for a few days. At this point, Mark's parents split up. He lived with each of them for a while and then settled with his father. However he says: 'I never got on with my dad and we had massive rows. I used to run away and I'd go and escape to my friends a few miles away from where I lived. I'd stay with them for a few days.' Mark became involved in drugs and crime, pressurised into it by people he met while on the streets. 'I didn't really even like them,' he admits. 'They'd go round and see other people and persuade me to go with them - they were older and more violent than me, and I didn't say "no." Then it became a way of life.' As a result, Mark had problems at school and was eventually excluded. By the time he was 14, the tensions at home had intensified and his father became violent towards him. He was subsequently thrown out of the house and lived with a friend's family. But that wasn't the end of the story. Eventually he had to leave that haven too and moved in with his mother. Heartbreakingly, she was also violent towards him and he frequently ran away. At 16, he left home for good and moved into a hostel. All this was despite help from social services since the age of 11. 'Social services helped me quite a bit, but they probably didn't help me as much as they could have done,' says Mark. 'They do try, but sometimes they can't offer as much as they should.'
Theo's story Theo lived with his mother, father and three sisters. There was a lot of arguing between the sisters which Theo found upsetting because he didn't like to see his family arguing. From the age of six, Theo began running away in the evenings while his mother was out working and his older sisters were too busy arguing about who should look after him to notice where he was. Theo used to go to the local park where he would meet up with the local vagrants and streetdrinkers. Some of these people were kind and kept an eye on him, while others gave him alcohol to drink. On one occasion, Theo was approached by an older man. 'This bloke came up to me and started talking to me,' recalls Theo. 'He said: "Do you want to come with me?" and I said "No" and ran as fast as I could. I wouldn't look back.' This isn't unusual - two-thirds of young runaways have reported dubious approaches by an adult while on the street. Sometimes Theo was picked up by the police and taken home. For a while, he stopped running - his sisters left home when he was 11, so there was no conflict. However, the arguments began again when his mother and father hit rocky times. In a bid to escape the arguments, Theo once again began running away, this time staying overnight at friends. On one occasion, he was away for four nights. Theo also began truanting, which caused further conflict at home. Theo is still living with his mother and father but still runs away periodically when he needs a break from the arguments at home.
Simon's story Simon started running away from home when he was 10 'for a laugh.' He used to meet up with friends and walk around for a few hours during the day, returning home when he was hungry. The first time, Simon was given a lecture by his parents and grounded for several weeks. The running away continued however and his behaviour began to deteriorate. At one point, Simon and his friends started stealing from cars and smashing windows on the estate where they lived. By the age of 12, Simon was running away overnight, drinking alcohol, sniffing glue and smoking cannabis. He began to steal money from his parents to support himself while he was running. Both the police and social services became involved as a result of his behaviour. In the end - when Simon was just 14 - his parents decided they couldn't cope with his behaviour any longer. He was placed in a children's home, from which he also ran away on many occasions to go to raves. When he was 17, he was homeless for a year and stayed with friends as well as sleeping rough. He eventually got a place in a hostel where he lived for a year. He now lives in a flat with his girlfriend.
Jenny's story Jenny lived with her mother, father and two older brothers. The family were very close and Jenny was happy. However, when she was five her father died and her mother became depressed and too ill to look after the children. Social services became involved and the children were placed in individual foster homes - in short, the family was divided. Each child spent a week living with their mother on their own and two weeks with the foster parents. While Jenny liked her foster parents, she understandably missed her mum and would run away to see her: 'I just wanted to be with my mum.' All alone and only six years old, Jenny would try to walk the 12 miles to her mother's home. Sometimes she made it, sometimes she was picked up by the police first. Her mum was always pleased to see her but would explain that she had to call social services who would then take Jenny back to her foster parents. It took a while for Jenny to settle down, but she hasn't run away for the last few months. She finally understands that it is not possible for her to live with her mother at the moment, and she is happy in her foster home.
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