Mad moments in the labour

labour laughsiVillage mums reveal their labour laughs

'Are you trying to come on to me?'
While having the epidural, the anaesthetist was rubbing ice up and down my thigh to see if it had taken effect. Anyway, being dozy while high on gas and air, I asked him if he was trying to come on to me!

DS (dear son) arrives safely and I'm on my way back to the ward when who should walk past but the anaesthetist. He gave me a wink and congratulated me. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me!
Aly77

Crispy duck with your contractions?
When I had Emma (my third child), I was told by the hospital that, even though my waters had broken, I wasn't in labour yet so I should go home for a while. I decided to stop for a Chinese takeaway on the way home but by this time the contractions were coming thick and fast. We still went home though and I tried to eat my crispy duck in between contractions, but as you can imagine, I couldn't really concentrate on my dinner. I decided that I needed to go straight back to hospital but on the way there just knew that I was going to give birth in the car. In panic, I shouted at DH (dear husband) that I needed to push and his response was 'That is NOT an option!'. But out came Emma' he didn't even have time to pull over!
mom_ed2005

To push or to pee?
Not sure if this is funny or awful, but I gave birth to my son while sitting on the toilet. I was insistent that I needed to go even though my midwife tried to persuade me that it was just the baby getting ready to come out. I found the sitting position quite comfy, I suppose it was a kind of birthing stool. I'm thinking of giving him the middle name 'Louis' - hee hee.
fiona77

'Do you want something between your legs?'
With the birth of my first, my husband was trying to help me while I was in extreme pain and innocently asked, 'Do you want something between your legs?' (he meant, 'like a pillow?'). I promptly told him that it was a bit late for that.
mum_esty

What not to wear
I was looking after a woman in labour and it was decided that she needed a caesarean because she wasn't progressing. Obviously she was very anxious and I was trying to reassure her that she would be fine as we went into theatre. Once we got there, the surgeon and his assistant came to the operating table, but when the operation started, the surgeon's trousers fell down! They were theatre trousers that tie at the waist but obviously he hadn't done his up properly. It was absolutely hilarious, everybody who could see what was happening but he couldn't do anything about it as he was already scrubbed up and sterile, ready for the op. He had to ask me to pull his trousers up for him. All of us, including the Mum who was really nervous, fell about laughing - it really lightened the atmosphere.
helenthemidwife

Dressed to impress
It was 3am and I was having real problems during labour so the consultant was called out. She had obviously been fast asleep in bed, because when she turned up she was wearing some tracksuit bottoms and a cardigan. In typical consultant style, she strode into the room and swiped open the curtain, and as she did so, out popped her boobs! Cheered up my partner no end.
lucylou432

Crazy cravings
During labour with my DS (dear son) who is now two-and-a-half, I decided that I wanted someone to ring the local radio station and request Build Me Up Buttercup for some unknown reason. I blame the gas and air!
tomandsprout

'Not my poonani!'
I told a doctor he was not going to put his 'big hand up my poonani' as it would hurt. When he did, I swore at him and when he broke my waters I apparently tried to kick him. On a return visit to the hospital about eight weeks after the birth, I met the same doctor. He smiled when he saw me, and said that I had really made him laugh during my labour as he'd never heard it called 'a poonani' before, but he's been calling it that ever since.
helenweb2004

The food thief
During my first labour, my mum came with me. While I was walking around, trying to cope with contractions, a nurse came in with the dinner trolley and asked if I wanted some food. I was starving but a bit too busy to think of food just then. There was no stopping my mum though. She promptly said 'yes please' and took the offered meal from the surprised nurse. She then sat on the bed eating her way through a plateful of meatballs and potatoes. Between mouthfuls, she kept asking if she could do anything for me. I answered her with a stiff smile, gritting my teeth: 'No, don't you worry, please finish your food first'. She even took my pudding too but I think she suddenly felt guilty because she left it. Anyway, later that evening I had a healthy baby girl but my Mum has never lived down the fact that she ate my dinner while I was busy giving birth!
ksh6372

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