| Spa review: Champneys Health Farm, Tring
Inside the main mansion, housing the guest rooms, the restaurant and the drawing room, the rooms are all decorated in Regency style. My treatments are not due to start until the afternoon, so there is ample time to read the papers in the very ornate 'Drawing Room', where I curl up on a sofa sipping herbal tea in front of a roaring, hypnotic fire. While I relax, I try to spot some celebrity Champney-lovers - who include the likes of Cilla Black, Naomi Campbell and David Beckham. My only spot is a fleeting Frank Bruno, but he'll do. I chat to a 35-year-old advertising executive who is here with her boyfriend for a weekend of pampering - he is opting for the sports massage. He smiles politely but I think is perhaps a little uncomfortable in his robe which is threatening to reveal his modesty - he is 6ft 2, and it barely skims his thighs.
Ushered by a reassuringly radiant-skinned young woman into a candlelit room, I was de-robed and asked to lie down on a comfortable treatment table. Gentle meditation music was playing quietly (thankfully, not a birthing whale in earshot), and warm towels were placed along my body. My therapist, Sarah, asked me a few general questions about the state of my skin, before applying a gentle exfoliant, followed by an invigorating facial massage. Next she applied a white china clay mask which removes surface impurities by absorbing excess oils, and also refines the skin pores.
Before my final treatment, I head for lunch, which at Champney's is serious business indeed. Plates are marked with separate areas for protein, fat and carbohydrate and guests can help themselves to the salads and different hot dishes on offer. I opt for a tasty salmon and salad followed by fruit for pudding. It is delicious, but I try to hold back, I don't want to be too full before my massage. And more importantly, I am keen to save myself for the home-made cake for tea, about which there has been much talk. Before long I was back in the spa, lying face down on a treatment bed in a warm unfussy room. Beginning with my back, my therapist began by gently but firmly kneading my neck and shoulders - as most of my stress runs straight to that area she had her work cut out removing all the stubborn knots. She continued on to my legs, working on each one individually, then massaging my feet, arms and hands before rolling me over and finishing off with my neck, this time incorporating a head massage (pure heaven). At the end of the hour, I felt suitably stress-busted, and a lot less tense. Champneys is the perfect starting post for anyone wanting to kick-start a new health or fitness regime, and I left feeling not just pampered, but tuned up and enthusiastic about maintaining my cleansed body and shiny new skin. For those who prefer their pedicure to come with a side of champagne, this is not for you - alcohol is limited to half a bottle per guest over the evening meal and the bars are soft drinks only. But if you are willing to take the strict health philosophy as seriously as they do, it's a worthwhile sacrifice - the treatments are fantastic, and leave lasting benefits. Before home, I float to the tea-room for my much-anticipated cake stop before heading off to yoga for some relaxing stretching. As a stressed out city-dweller it is no mean feat to realise that all thoughts of deadlines and rush hours seem far away. And as I lie horizontally on my mat, with lights dimmed and my mind occupied by nothing but fluffy clouds and pretty colours, I realise my spa mission is complete and I am delighted to be finally thinking of... nothing. Offers for Champneys, Tring
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