Once upon a time, blind dates were quaint novelties that happened in the movies. These days, we're all at it. You meet online, swap a few emails, and before you know it, you're meeting a near-stranger under the clock at Waterloo. How should you get the best out of this nerve-wracking experience?
1. Meet in public
A blind date is not a time for cuddling up in front of a DVD at home. Keep it public, informal and flexible.
Sticking to a busy public venue, such as a pub or a coffee shop, keeps you safe. You may feel like you've made a 'connection' through your emails, but you still don't know this guy from Adam. A blind date should never be too private an affair.
Keeping things informal also allows you to size up your date without feeling trapped. Meeting for a drink or coffee allows you to leave after an hour or two if there's no chemistry. If you fancy the pants off him, you can suggest going on somewhere for dinner.
2. Find a talking point
'I love wine-tasting as a first date,' says Niki, 36. 'As well as being loads of fun, it gives you something to talk about afterwards.'
Sophie, 31, met her current boyfriend online and joined him for an art class. 'His emails mentioned his painting classes, so I went along to one for our first date. I hate those dates where you're sitting across a table trying to think of things to say.'
3. Do we shake hands or kiss?
Shaking hands is for job interviews, and hugging is too familiar. If you've swapped a few emails, a quick peck on the cheek is fine, but only if you feel comfortable doing so.
Read his body language. If he seems shy, hold off on the cheek-kissing until the end of your date. A big smile is the best greeting there is.
4. Beware of the 'babble trap'
Less is more when it comes to first-date information. Nerves make us talk far more than we realise.
But you need to offer enough positive info to keep him intrigued. This requires some pre-date prepping. Don't go in with a script, but arm yourself with a couple of interesting anecdotes. Travel stories work well, because they get you both talking about good times and future dreams.
'The hard part is squeezing your anecdotes in conversation,' says Laura, 40. 'I lead into them by asking him questions. I'll ask him about places he'd love to travel to and follow up with my own stories. That way, I'm not just babbling about myself.'
5. Leave exes in the past
If he asks about your past loves, don't take it as a cue to spill the sordid details. Chances are he couldn't think of anything else to ask. Chatting about previous relationships sends the message that you haven't moved on.
6. Ask questions
The art of conversation is partly about your ability to ask good open-ended questions. Take your cues from what's going on around you. For example, if he suggested your date venue, ask about the first time he went there.
Also, take your cues from what you know about him already. Before your date, read his emails and note the things you'd like to know more about.
'One guy mentioned online that he liked fishing,' says Susie, 29. 'He was only 26 and it seemed so unusual. As soon as I asked him about his biggest catch, he was off on one. I didn't have to work at the conversation at all!'
Just remember not to interrogate the poor man. This is a date, not a job interview.
7. Body language tricks
Body language speaks volumes. First, relax; a tense, closed posture tells your date that you'd rather not be there.
Before you walk into the pub or get off the bus, take a few deep breaths, drop your shoulders and smile. If you learn to act relaxed, you really will feel more relaxed.
Eye contact is your most powerful body language weapon. Holding his gaze for a second or two creates a physical and psychological connection that's hard to resist.
8. Drink sensibly
A drink or two eases your shyness and is an age-old social winner. But it's not a magic confidence bullet. Booze on an empty stomach can quickly turn you from confident companion into one-woman Blackpool hen night.
Know your limits and stick to them. Next time you're out with your friends ask them to tell you honestly when you start acting tipsy. That's the point when you should switch to orange juice on a date.
9. Letting him down gently
Be honest. Don't make a dash out of the loo window. End the date after a couple of hours by saying that you need to head home. Thank him for a lovely time. If he suggests another date, politely decline. Even if he insisted on buying all the drinks (I hope you offered to pay your way), you don?t owe him anything. He'll get over it.
10. The next date?
Again, be honest and don't play games. At the end of the date, say that you'd like to do it again. Forget those 'rules' about letting him do all the chasing, waiting three days before calling and so on.
However, remember that he may feel differently in the cold light of day. If he decides that he'd rather not meet up again, don't push it. The world, and the internet, are stuffed with gorgeous single men who'd love to date you many times over.
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