The relationship audit
It's very easy to take a relationship for granted - particularly if it seems to be going well. But are there sharks lurking beneath the surface?
If you feel your relationship is strong enough for a challenge - or if you suspect that things are not as good as they could be - then iVillage has the answer. Our unique relationship audit workshop lets you explore your partnership in depth. See how it's doing. Discover if there are any danger spots or minefields?
Preparation
Set aside about three hours - a typical evening - when you and your partner can talk. Take the phone off the hook, put the remote control down the back of the sofa and leave the wine in the fridge, at least until later. You'll need clear heads and hearts to start to open up to each other.
Have two copies of the discussion points below, one for you and one for your partner. You will also need paper and pen handy.
Process
Each 'exploration' will involve you writing things down individually, then talking together about what you've written.
When it comes to the talking, it'll work better if you take it in turns, so that one person has the floor all to themselves and the listener simply listens. If necessary, get a small object and pass it from one to the other, the rule being that whoever's holding is the only one to speak.
Once you've each expressed your views about each question, go back and talk about what you've both learned. You'll get a lot not only from listening to your partner's views, but also from expressing your own. What did each of you say that the other didn't expect? What have you learned about each other? What do you now realise you need to change in order to make your relationship work even better? What action do you need to take to make these changes?
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iVillage Ltd is a UK company registered in England & Wales (3837269) at 80-110 New Oxford Street, London WC1 1HB
