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The story of Tanya Grey
I hate thinking about the lonely, pathetic person I became when I was with Dave, but I’ll tell my story to help other women avoid going through what I did. Before I met him, I was confident and outgoing.
We met at a party. I was studying psychology as a mature age student in Bristol. I was 28, he was 10 years older, which always made him seem more like the boss. For the first few months we were together, I felt madly in love.
He was in the army, a special unit near Hereford. He was very good looking, superfit. He travelled a lot and hinted that his work was dangerous and secretive. I found him really sexy. He had this strong body and intense eyes. He made the other men I’d been out with seem like little boys.
At first we had fun. When he was off duty, he’d take me up to the Brecon Beacons, we’d walk for miles, have pub lunches, then go back to a B&B and have sex. He was commanding in bed and, at first, I hate to admit this now, it seemed sexy. The odd smack on the bum, or he’d hold me down in bed and make it feel threatening, then he’d kiss me tenderly afterwards.
But I overlooked some weird stuff. We’d be driving in the car and he’d say, ‘unbutton your blouse and take it off,’ then he’d touch me quite roughly. One day when I said, ‘ouch! That hurts,’ he stopped the car, slapped my face and told me he’d touch me any way he wanted. It’s horrible to think that I didn’t jump out of the car there and then and tell him to bugger off, but I didn’t. I burst into tears and cried hysterically. I probably even apologised. How sick is that? And then he told me he was sorry too, he’d been working hard, that he loved me, and he was frightened of losing me. It was the first time he told me he loved me, and it seemed so intense. Not long after that we got engaged.
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