Seven days of loving

Spend today doing things that are fun. It doesn’t have to cost a lot of money. Wrap up warm and go for a walk in the park. Go to an afternoon movie and eat popcorn in the back row. Do something you haven’t done for years – bowling, ice skating or a bike ride. In the evening, eat together at home or away. Or curl up on the sofa with a video and enjoy just being together.

And make a resolution, in the future, to do something together at least once a week. Sign up for an evening class, learn to dance, take up a sport. The possibilities are endless.

Day Four: show some affection
It’s so important to touch, to feel skin on skin. Sure, there’s contact during sex but most people, men as well as women, need more than that. They need the safety of being cuddled and the comfort of being held. They need a regular dose of their partner’s smell and taste in order to stay close.

So today, keep touching. Start by snuggling up to each other as you wake and remember that as it’s Sunday, you can stay in bed as long as you want.

Then keep the contact. As you pass on the stairs, offer a hug. If you go out together, link hands. Choose the sofa to snuggle up on as you watch the television.

Back in bed at the end of the day, fall asleep in each other’s arms.

Day Five: sexual feeling
Yes, sex is great but sometimes, it simply gets de-prioritised. So this evening, switch the answerphone on and turn the television off, unless, of course, you have an erotic video to watch.

You don’t have to get sexual. If the mood doesn’t strike you can just enjoy stroking and fondling. But if you do find desire building, then try this.

Each take quarter of an hour to ask for just what you want. To be stroked? To be fondled? To have your partner use hands or mouth? To enjoy your favourite intercourse position? The only barrier is that you mustn’t ask for something you know your partner objects to.

The whole point of this game is that you can relax and enjoy receiving pleasure without having to worry about giving. Just for a while, the focus is all on you. So enjoy.

A great resource for new sexual ideas is The Great Sex Guide by Anne Hooper, (Dorling Kindersley, £7.99).