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  |  Couples  |  Intimacy & commitment  |  How far should I go to get my boyfriend back?
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How far should I go to get my boyfriend back?

by Sherry Amatenstein

question
Dear Sherry
My boyfriend of two years and I recently agreed to a friendly separation. Everything had been going well until about three months ago when, for some reason, I got bored and started to treat him badly. During this separation period, I've come to the conclusion that I really love this man and want to work things out. However, he feels that a lot of damage has been done and that perhaps the relationship cannot be saved. I want him back but do not want to seem desperate. Should I send him flowers at work? Please let me know your thoughts.
L

answer
Dear L
First, make absolutely sure, or as sure as possible, that the motivation driving you to heal the rift between you and your boyfriend is love for him, not fear of being alone. Are there problems inherent in the relationship that seem irresolvable? In the long run, would you truly be better off without him? If that's the case, let him go gracefully.

But if, after you delve within, you decide that he is the one you want, then you really need to make amends. Sending him flowers along with an explanation for your bad behaviour, and sincere promises to do whatever it takes to win him back, is a good start.

Don't worry about seeming desperate; now is the time to grovel. Good luck.

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