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Was today a bad relationship day?
Of course, some relationship problems are down to incompatibility. Or to crisis - you've just lost your job, he's just had an affair. But most of the time you and your partner end up at each other's throats, there's just one reason. Life. You're physically exhausted and out of energy mentally. You just can't cope.
Think back over the past month and ask your man to do the same if he's willing. Ask yourself how many rows you've had within half an hour of coming in from work, or within an hour of opening that bottle of wine. If the answer is more than three in the last four weeks, then read on.
Tired out
Do you both work? Do you both work hard? Do you both work long hours and then come home to the housework and the kids? If you do, then sheer exhaustion may be making trouble.
Slow down. Cut down on non-essential work. Make more time for sleep and regular breaks away. And think seriously about shortening your hours. That may mean less income, but the reward could be a stronger relationship.
Stressed out
If you demand a lot of yourself or if family, friends and boss demand a lot of you, then sheer stress may make you irritable and depressed. Feeling affectionate or passionate will be the last thing on your mind in the evening.
Relaxation's the key here. Half an hour spent listening to music, or better still a relaxation tape, can cool you down enough to give and receive love. Longer term, take steps to investigate alternative approaches - like aromatherapy - to help keep you more relaxed on a day-to-day basis.
Next page: Illness, alcohol and hormones
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