Was today a bad relationship day?

My husband and I sorted that one a few years ago by introducing 'down time'. When we come in, we don't eat until we've each had ten minutes to share the ups and downs of our days. This works wonders.

Give me some space
On the other hand, if your lifestyle dictates that you spend a lot of time with each other, then you can get on each other's nerves through over-exposure. You both need time alone, and in your own space, on a regular basis. If you don't have much room at home, then go for a walk or have an early night. Down time on the computer helps too - so long as you don't spend all your time online and no time with your love.

Special days
Strange as it may seem, key days in your life can mean low points in your relationship. Anniversaries may make you feel tearful. Important events may make you stressed. Celebrations may make you feel bad because you expect the best and it doesn't happen.

If a key day in your life is looming, recognise it. Go easy on yourself - and on each other. Talk it through and make an extra effort to keep calm and kind.

It is possible - and more than possible - to avoid bad relationship days. So check out all the elements I've mentioned. Make a note of those that strike home, then take action. You can troubleshoot your life and get rid of those bad relationship days altogether.

What makes your day a bad one? Tell us about it on the The highs and lows of being a couple message board.