How to date younger men

2. Great conversation

As women grow older and become more sexually confident, we also tend to become more intellectually confident – and competent. In short, we're more fun to talk to.

What the daters say: 'I recently had a fling with a guy who was only 23,' says Sarah, 36. 'He's a musician, and he'd never been able to talk about music with girls his age. We'd sit up all night discussing David Bowie albums. He was amazed that a woman could talk about these things.

'In the end I needed someone with a bit more experience, but the fling gave me loads of confidence. Younger men think we're interesting and cool, because we've lived and travelled and we can talk about all sorts.'

3. Independence

Ask any man why he ditched his last girlfriend, and the word 'clingy' is likely to come up. The solution? Date a woman who has her own life, friends, career and home.

The Bridget Jones myth has done a great disservice to women over 30. Women do not all grow up with baby-hunger in their eyes, or with a need to settle down. More and more of us are going our own way, and men love it.

What the daters say: 'My previous girlfriends were younger than me,' says Jamie, 28. 'I liked being around them, but after a while I felt suffocated. It's like they couldn't enjoy themselves unless I was around, and that was too much responsibility. I like my space. I think most men do.

'Now I'm seeing a woman who's 35, and it's fantastic. She has her own place, and she loves her career and friends. Her social life doesn't always include me. She doesn't need me, she wants me. That really turns me on.'

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Part II: Traps to avoid

1. The money trap

Ryan, 29: 'My girlfriend is 39 and we've been together five years. I want to live together, and she doesn't. She bought her own place years ago. She's scared that we'll break up and I'll grab her money. That's not why I want her!'

What to do: Stop making assumptions. A younger man doesn't necessarily want an older woman for her money. Discuss your fears before making decisions.