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  |  Single & Dating  |  The Dating Game  |  He's handsome, clever, funny and .... married
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He's handsome, clever, funny and .... married

by Sally Ann Lasson

question
Dear Sally Ann
I have recently become friendly with an extremely handsome, clever, funny and sensual married man. I know this is wrong, everything about it is wrong, but it feels right. We get on really well, have the right chemistry and I literally feel like melting when he touches me. I have such a strong desire to get involved with him. At the moment I am enjoying my freedom and like getting lots of male attention, so maybe this relationship is not so detrimental. My only concern is about getting hurt, which always seems to happen to the 'other woman'. What do you think?
Seduce

answer
Dear Seduce
I can't see that you have a problem here. You're enjoying being single and you have a casual interest in a married man. So what? You're not going to get a prize for this but neither are you going to be tarred and feathered. Inherent to every relationship is the risk of getting hurt. And contrary to popular belief, the 'other woman' is as likely to 'win' a war over a man as his wife is. That's one of the reasons why there are so many divorces.

While you are obviously very attracted to this man you seem to be quite dispassionate about it. Usually, people get involved in these situations first and think about it later. If you think it's 'wrong' why don't you walk away?

If you pursue this relationship you will have no more powers of prediction about the future than you would have with an unmarried man. Anything could happen. This could be true love or you might find him irritating when you get to know him better. Perhaps he snores. Maybe he'll tell his wife about you. He might even leave his wife for you. You might get more than you bargained for. They say there are two great tragedies in life: not getting what you want, and getting it.

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