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The art of splitting up gently but firmly
Dear Sherry
My boyfriend of two months is a wonderful man, but I'm just not in love and I know I won't fall in love. Unfortunately, he says he loves me and wants to get serious. What's the kindest way to split up with him?
Cindy
Dear Cindy
Do it gently and quickly. Say something like, ‘You're a wonderful man and I really enjoy being with you. But, since I don't think we have what it takes in the long run, I care about you too much to lead you on.’
Do it gently and quickly. Say something like, ‘You're a wonderful man and I really enjoy being with you. But, since I don't think we have what it takes in the long run, I care about you too much to lead you on.’
Here are three don'ts:
- Don't make him feel he did something wrong that turned you off
- Don't make him feel that there is something physically or emotionally wrong with him
- Don't give him false hope that you'll change your mind
- Do treat him with respect and answer his questions as honestly, but diplomatically, as possible
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