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  |  Single & Dating  |  Is He Right For You?  |  Is my boyfriend just a habit?
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Is my boyfriend just a habit?

by Susan Quilliam

question
I'm confused. I love my boyfriend and I know he loves me but I keep wondering what it would be like being single again. We have been together for two and a half years now. I'm scared to break up with him in case I make the biggest mistake of my life but, I'm scared of staying with him if it's just because of habit. I'm stuck.

answer
If you're really in love with someone, you're happy with them and they're good for you, then you may find yourself wondering whether to be single of not, but you won't wonder for very long. And if you think about splitting-up, you realise that you wouldn't be half the person you are without your partner, and that your life would be meaningless without them.

I have to be honest. I don't get the sense that you're really in love with your boyfriend. I get the sense that you're scared of being alone, that if you were alone you'd panic and want your boyfriend back - but that doesn't mean you love him, it just means you need him at the moment. If you had someone else to love and be loved by, then the loneliness would pass.

I'd wait a while and see how your feelings go. In time, either your love for your boyfriend will win out, or - I have to say more likely - you'll realise that it is time to move on. Whichever, in the end you'll be happier than you are now.
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