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Reading His Body Language

by Dr Pam Spurr

Dr Pam SpurrThere are some very straightforward signs to look for that show either a man is interested in you, or that he's not that bothered about you. Here, we find out what those secret signals are, and what they really mean

The chemistry between two people is fascinating. I'm sure you've been surprised at times when looking at a couple and thinking, 'How on earth did they get together? They look so ill-suited!' This is because personal chemistry is determined by many factors and is primarily guided by non-verbal communication, or body-language signals.

Non-verbal communication accounts for about 93 per cent of all communication, and is terribly important in the communication between two potential partners.

Signs of interest

  • He gives you the 'triple take' - glances once, glances twice, and then either holds your eye contact or smiles
  • He pulls his posture up fairly confidently
  • He might loop his fingers into his pockets or belt loop in a subconscious gesture to guide your eye line down toward his 'masculinity'
  • He uses the male 'saunter' - that masculine walk (slight swagger) if he's walking towards you
  • Once chatting, he closes your personal spaces by 'bridging' between you (e.g. touching your forearm as he speaks)
  • He uses the 'slide' where he moves his fingers up and down his glass
  • He uses the 'screen' when he moves in slightly nearer and screens you off from other potential male competitors with his upper body. At this point he stops flicking his eyes around the room in a sub-conscious search for other attractive women

Signs that he's not interested

  • When engaged in conversation he continually looks around, especially every time the door opens as someone new enters the bar. This means he's only partly interested in you and is keeping his options open
  • He asks you a question and when you start to answer, his gaze drifts off, or he interrupts your answer with something else
  • When seated, his feet and legs point away from you, even if his upper body is twisted towards you - a subconscious signal that he's looking for a way out of the situation
  • He appears easily distracted during a conversation. Trust your intuition, he's not really in to the conversation!
  • He half-heartedly asks for your phone number with no enthusiasm or real interest. Again, rely on your intuition - it's there for good reason.



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