Relationships 

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Ten ways to succeed at online dating

How to meet the person of your dreams from the comfort of home. Putting online dating in perspective


Any activity that has, at least, 20 million participants must be a mainstream activity, if not a social movement, right? So although many people have tried online dating, not all are getting its full benefit.

1. Starting with a positive attitude
Although online dating may have started with computer nerds in chat rooms, those days are long gone. If you're still stuck with perceptions of those bygone days, snap out of it. The best way to meeting people is passing you by. Special note to those people who didn't grow up with a computer mouse in one hand and a baby rattle in the other: Be grateful that you're single in a time when online dating came of age.

2. Beginning slow and gaining momentum
Face it. You're probably a novice with online dating, just as much as you were with every other new experience. Give yourself time to figure it out. Specifically, if you fall in love in the first week or first month of online dating, you are either very lucky or deluding yourself.

3. Avoiding discussion of your previous relationship woes
When you talk about past troubles, you come across as a negative person. When you have the same discussion on email, rather than in person, you come across even more negative, and you don't have the eye contact to know when you've gone over the top. Save these discussions for a more advanced stage of your relationship.

4. Writing a profile that reflects you
Remember that you're trying to attract an appropriate match. If you write something that describes what you want to be rather than who you really are, you're sure to disappoint your prospective match, sooner or later. If you have someone help you write your profile, use him or her only to critique your work and encourage you. If someone else writes your profile, you may as well send him or her on your dates.

5. Remembering the number of psychos on the Internet reflects real life
The Internet is a microcosm of society, not a separate branch. Just as you may meet them at a bar, launderette, or supermarket, 'crazy' people lurk on the Internet, too. But, certainly, no more and no less so. Most of the horror stories about online dating are media hype looking for something titillating to fill the space between ads. The fact is that the power of anonymity unique to online dating gives you increased security over face-to-face dating, if you take care to guard that special power.

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