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One is not amused
continued from page 1
Not that they should complain. If they were on a rollercoaster, they might be seated next to a complete stranger (to fill the carriage so it makes enough money) and be sprayed by someone else's sick.
But it's not just society that is guilty of Solo-ism. Your nearest and dearest can be the worst offenders.
Take a wedding I went to recently. I chipped in for a lift with a friend and her fella on a five-hour drive to Wales. It's a wonder I didn't get the first reported case of car deep-vein thrombosis after being squashed in the back - a garden gnome would have been pushed for leg room.
They are one of my favourite couples, but it didn't even occur to them to give me a go in the front seat for a little while. There or back. In between, I had the delights of my hotel room to enjoy.
Seems the rip-off supplement I paid for a single room did get me something extra. Non-stop music from the function room beneath me - and a single bed even a sideways Liz Hurley would have been too big for.
The wedding knees-up got me thinking about presents - another annoying thorn in the single person's side. Christmas and birthdays mean buying presents for both people in a couple, so why don't you get two gifts back? And that's even before the engagement, wedding, and christenings. Couples, meanwhile, can give presents jointly, halving the bill for each individual. Giving is most definitely better than receiving when you're part of a pair.
But I've hit on a way to make myself feel better - I'm going to make a list all of my own I'm going to throw a Payback Party in recognition of all the presents I've coughed up for. I'll be able to furnish an empty house with all of the stuff I get.
In the words of Destiny's Child, it is indeed time for all the Independent Ladies (and laddies) to throw their hands up at everyone who treats them differently, just because they're still journeying on life's path on their own.
I think I'll start by going back to that cafe, ordering home-made hummus, slow-roasted vegetables, lightly toasted pitta bread and mediterranean olives, and then ordering the waitress to put exactly half in a bag for me to take home. Being single might mean there's only one of me, but this time, I'm going to have twice the pleasure.
Not that they should complain. If they were on a rollercoaster, they might be seated next to a complete stranger (to fill the carriage so it makes enough money) and be sprayed by someone else's sick.
But it's not just society that is guilty of Solo-ism. Your nearest and dearest can be the worst offenders.
Take a wedding I went to recently. I chipped in for a lift with a friend and her fella on a five-hour drive to Wales. It's a wonder I didn't get the first reported case of car deep-vein thrombosis after being squashed in the back - a garden gnome would have been pushed for leg room.
They are one of my favourite couples, but it didn't even occur to them to give me a go in the front seat for a little while. There or back. In between, I had the delights of my hotel room to enjoy.
Seems the rip-off supplement I paid for a single room did get me something extra. Non-stop music from the function room beneath me - and a single bed even a sideways Liz Hurley would have been too big for.
The wedding knees-up got me thinking about presents - another annoying thorn in the single person's side. Christmas and birthdays mean buying presents for both people in a couple, so why don't you get two gifts back? And that's even before the engagement, wedding, and christenings. Couples, meanwhile, can give presents jointly, halving the bill for each individual. Giving is most definitely better than receiving when you're part of a pair.
But I've hit on a way to make myself feel better - I'm going to make a list all of my own I'm going to throw a Payback Party in recognition of all the presents I've coughed up for. I'll be able to furnish an empty house with all of the stuff I get.
In the words of Destiny's Child, it is indeed time for all the Independent Ladies (and laddies) to throw their hands up at everyone who treats them differently, just because they're still journeying on life's path on their own.
I think I'll start by going back to that cafe, ordering home-made hummus, slow-roasted vegetables, lightly toasted pitta bread and mediterranean olives, and then ordering the waitress to put exactly half in a bag for me to take home. Being single might mean there's only one of me, but this time, I'm going to have twice the pleasure.
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