Relationships 

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10 ways to find a man for Christmas

Christmas may seem far off - but preparations are already underway - presents, cakes and party invites are being considered, but what about a man? With our unique ten-step plan you can be sure you won't be alone under the mistletoe

Step one: decide what you really want
What sort of man do you want to be with over the festive season? A fun friend to bring to the office party? A red-hot lover who is happy to spend Christmas Day between the sheets? Or a full on commitment that'll lead to wedding bells by the summer? Be flexible - don't create an identikit picture stating eye colour, height and profession - but do think through the role you want this man to play in your life.

Action: Think about your current situation before deciding what sort of man and relationship you want. Write it down. Read it daily.

Step two: clear away your mental blocks What's stopped you getting a man in the past? Were you too nervous to make the first move? Were you so picky that you turned down every guy at first glance? Or perhaps you were still so in love with your ex that you simply weren't open to other offers.

Action: Choose a trusted friend and ask her (or him) to give you clear feedback. Make sure they give you some achievable things to change - get a new hairstyle, smile more etc. With more in-depth problems, you need to examine how you behave and be honest about where you're going wrong. If you feel you need serious support, find yourself a counsellor; even just a few sessions can help.

Step three: meet, meet, meet!
The equation's quite simple - the more men you meet, the better chance you have of finding the right one. This strategy's particularly important when you're on a Christmas deadline. So especially if you're past the peak dating-age of 16-22, where almost every man you meet is single, you absolutely have to get out there.

Action: Just from now until Christmas, accept every invitation. Ask everyone you know to introduce you to their friends. Log on to friendship and dating sites. Go to singles clubs. Quite simply, break the mould of your existing social life and meet as many new people as possible.

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