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I want a normal man
Dear Sally Ann
I’m 26 and have been single for a year. I never used to have problems finding men, but when I hit 25, everything changed. I have an active social life and many interests, but I just don’t seem to meet any men I fancy. The only guys that ask me out are either geeky ones with personal hygiene problems that are only after one thing, or weirdos. The last one was an obsessive compulsive with a reputation for stalking. I just want to meet someone normal. What can I do?
Isabel
Dear Isabel
Two things happen to women as they get older: they gain experience and they get pickier about the men they go out with. When you first start dating, men are like presents that you unwrap to see what’s inside. It’s all a surprise, you wonder which bit goes where, and if there’s something you don’t like, you throw that one out and get another one. After a few years, you realise that there are types of men you don’t want to bother unwrapping because you already know what’s on offer without looking. That’s what’s happened to you.
Two things happen to women as they get older: they gain experience and they get pickier about the men they go out with. When you first start dating, men are like presents that you unwrap to see what’s inside. It’s all a surprise, you wonder which bit goes where, and if there’s something you don’t like, you throw that one out and get another one. After a few years, you realise that there are types of men you don’t want to bother unwrapping because you already know what’s on offer without looking. That’s what’s happened to you.
Huge swathes of men are geeky or obsessive and now you can spot them a mile away. Good. It saves time. A much smaller group of men are normal and personable but they are harder to find and everyone else wants them too. Also, there is the further complication that they have to like you too. All I can tell you is that it will happen because it always does – eventually. Don’t compromise with the stalkers, stay busy, always go to that party that you don’t really feel like going to and, one day, he’ll be there. The upside to your predicament is that you’ll be able to recognise him when he is.
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