The essence of attraction

Personally, I am rather partial to short, balding Jewish men like Bob Hoskins and Danny DeVito. They look like they give good cuddle. But, like Gloria, I have no control over the sort of men I fall for. There are other agendas that determine the physical types we are attracted to. For example, Gloria’s father was 19 stone, so it’s not surprising she’s chosen Gary. In my family, there are a lot of short, Jewish balding men who have been wonderful to me.

The fact that men are looking for high-street versions of Kate Moss, Naomi Campbell and Jennifer Lopez might say something about their mothers. But my theory is that there are plenty of beautiful women out there, but not enough good-looking men to go around – so we are forced to settle for second best, ignoring the flabby bellies and stunted growth. In the process, we discover other characteristics that are sexy, such as humour and a twinkle in the eye. The tragedy is, many men refuse to compromise and will spend most of their life replacing one pair of perfect breasts with another. In turn, Hollywood continues to replace one perfect starlet with another. It’s a pity they can’t learn to love us, warts and all.