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No spirit for Christmas
Dear Susan,
I am a 24-year-old single mother with an 18-month-old boy. This is our first Christmas since I separated from his father, and I'm getting depressed. I just don't seem to have the 'spirit', and I'm worried about getting through Christmas without being a family. I feel overwhelmed with sadness.
mmend
Dear mmend,
Of course you feel overwhelmed with sadness. It's absolutely natural that you should. You are recovering from the breakdown of an important relationship. And you are coping alone with a bouncy toddler. Plus, it's Christmas - when you feel everyone is enjoying themselves except you.
To make yourself feel better, firstly you must accept that you feel sad and it's natural that you do. Don't give yourself a hard time or try to cheer up - just allow the tears to flow and allow yourself to mourn the fact that something bad has happened.
At the same time, realise that these feelings of loss and upset will pass. This time next year, if you get the support you need, the sadness will be easier to handle. The year after, you may well be back on top form and feel happier than ever.
So make sure you have family and friends around you this Christmas. If you don't have either, then arrange to spend Christmas helping others so that at least you're in company then. But don't beat yourself up if you don't have 'the spirit'. Instead, look after yourself, be good to yourself and give your son lots of love and cuddles.
Hugs at Christmas,
Susan
Of course you feel overwhelmed with sadness. It's absolutely natural that you should. You are recovering from the breakdown of an important relationship. And you are coping alone with a bouncy toddler. Plus, it's Christmas - when you feel everyone is enjoying themselves except you.
To make yourself feel better, firstly you must accept that you feel sad and it's natural that you do. Don't give yourself a hard time or try to cheer up - just allow the tears to flow and allow yourself to mourn the fact that something bad has happened.
At the same time, realise that these feelings of loss and upset will pass. This time next year, if you get the support you need, the sadness will be easier to handle. The year after, you may well be back on top form and feel happier than ever.
So make sure you have family and friends around you this Christmas. If you don't have either, then arrange to spend Christmas helping others so that at least you're in company then. But don't beat yourself up if you don't have 'the spirit'. Instead, look after yourself, be good to yourself and give your son lots of love and cuddles.
Hugs at Christmas,
Susan
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