Whatever you want, dear
Saturday 9.00 am
This weekend is the beginning of the new me: a life filled with romance, where the family finances are in order and the house is transformed from the messy and chaotic home of two busy professionals, to something near perfect. This weekend I surrender.
To be perfectly fair, I am not the lonely, exhausted mess the American relationship guru Laura Doyle claims she was before she discovered the error of her ways and was inspired to write her book The Surrendered Wife: A Woman's Spiritual Guide to True Intimacy With A Man.
Then again, when I plaintively said to my brother, 'You don't think I'm bossy, do you?' he snorted derisively. So maybe it's time. After all, thousands of American women have adopted surrendering as their strategy. They're clogging chat rooms with their home-spun anecdotes of saved marriages and restored love.
Sure, I'm assertive. But I thought it was assertive in a sexy, educated, woman-with-a-mind/career/opinion-of-her-own kind of way. My relationship has had its ups and downs - whose hasn't? - but until I read Laura's book I never realised that it was 'all my fault'.
Apparently, it's true. Laura says so. The fact that my partner has a habit of leaving dirty socks and underwear strewn around the house or that we sometimes bicker in the car because we're lost (again) is all down to the fact that I haven't been polite, pleasant or respectful enough. After all, in the world according to Laura, 'he'd be much happier if he felt in control and made all the decisions just like an old-fashioned man should'.
The added bonus is guaranteed passion in the bedroom. You'll have great sex if, instead of initiating it, you just hang about in something flimsy and allow yourself to be conquered. The only problem is that, according to Laura, a good wife never says 'no' and I'm not sure if this means he'll always have to be on top from now on.
No doubt it will be the start of a beautiful and equally fulfilling phase of our lives together.
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