Relationships 

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Before you say 'I do'

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Topic two: Your marriage models
What you've seen of marriage - from your parents, relatives, friends, or your own previous marriage - will deeply affect how you handle being wed.

Think about a couple whose marriage has influenced you. Then work your way down the list below, ticking as many statements as apply to that couple. Then go back and write beside each whether you want to copy that behaviour or avoid it.

The areas in which you and your partner give different answers will show where you're likely to act differently once you're married. So if your 'marriage model' couple spent a lot of time together and you see that as a good thing but your partner's 'marriage model' couple were more independent and he likes that, then you need to talk that through and come to a compromise.

The couples whose marriages I feel I have been most influenced by:

talked to each other/talked very little/understood each other without words

were faithful to each other/had an open marriage/were generally faithful but understood if the other strayed

would never think of divorce/accepted divorce as a possibility but never did it/did divorce

had a good marriage/had a bad marriage/had a marriage that was sometimes good, sometimes bad

got lots of family support/hardly mixed with their families/were badly influenced by their families

argued a lot/never argued/argued but enjoyed it

spent a lot of time together/had their own separate lives

enjoyed being married/hated being married

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