Relationships 

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The great sex workshop - week three

Improve your sexual communication

Are you keeping up your Love Diary? You need to - it will help you to document your sexual journey and learn the truth about your sex-related patterns. Tracking your thoughts, feelings, sensations and activities will confirm or demystify your beliefs about how sex affects your life, and vice versa. Spending a week focusing on your sensual side should have given your senses the boost they need to bring your daily life to the cliffs of new pleasures. If not, you need to indulge your senses more. So go back and study. If you have yet to follow the plans for weeks one and two, stop here and go back. You'll be pleased that you did.

One element that keeps surfacing in my discussions with clients about healthy intimate relationships is the art of communication. It really is the key to a long-term, lasting and growing relationship. And, for most women, being in a healthy, intimate relationship is the foundation for great sex. Thus, communication is important to a great sex life. I'd like you to spend at least one day this week watching what you say. I did this once in a workshop and it honestly changed my life. During that day, listen to and stop yourself, whenever you begin to blame your partner, or when you start moaning to him or her.

Without those elements of speech, the whole world of communication will transform into one of empowerment and openness, and you will find fresh ways of thinking, talking and relating. Imagine going a whole day, week or, better yet, a lifetime without ever making an excuse or blaming your partner or yourself. This is not to say that you shouldn't communicate your desires to your mate - you should, and often. The more openly, directly and intimately you speak about sex, the better your sexual experience can be.

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