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Are you ready for sex?
Your first time with a new partner can be a nerve-wracking experience, especially for the young and sexually inexperienced. Susan Quilliam guides us through the basics
You've met a wonderful new partner. The chemistry is electric, you've kissed and cuddled, but then comes the big leap into having proper sex, intercourse. How do you do that? When do you do it? How soon is too soon? These are the questions that fill us with anguish. It's always tricky knowing how to go forward in a new relationship, but if you haven't had many partners, or it's your first time, the whole process can become really fraught.
Timing
First, when's the right time? In general, the better the relationship you have with someone, the better the sex is going to be. And we're not just talking lust here. If you're affectionate, can talk to each other, are able to confide hopes and dreams, then things will go better in bed. This isn't just a romantic ideal - it's a practicality. The more you know each other, the more pleasure you'll be able to give.
So use our five point checklist to tell whether you and your man are ready to take the leap to more intimacy - yes to more than three and you're on to a good thing; only one yes and you shouldn't be going ahead; and if yes to two, you may need a little more time to get to know each other:
You've met a wonderful new partner. The chemistry is electric, you've kissed and cuddled, but then comes the big leap into having proper sex, intercourse. How do you do that? When do you do it? How soon is too soon? These are the questions that fill us with anguish. It's always tricky knowing how to go forward in a new relationship, but if you haven't had many partners, or it's your first time, the whole process can become really fraught.
Timing
First, when's the right time? In general, the better the relationship you have with someone, the better the sex is going to be. And we're not just talking lust here. If you're affectionate, can talk to each other, are able to confide hopes and dreams, then things will go better in bed. This isn't just a romantic ideal - it's a practicality. The more you know each other, the more pleasure you'll be able to give.
So use our five point checklist to tell whether you and your man are ready to take the leap to more intimacy - yes to more than three and you're on to a good thing; only one yes and you shouldn't be going ahead; and if yes to two, you may need a little more time to get to know each other:
- Do you feel aroused when you're kissing and touching?
- Can you talk to each other about what you like physically?
- Are you starting to talk about the future, making plans at least six months ahead?
- Have you helped each other through a bad time at least once?
- Are you physically affectionate even when you're not being passionate?
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